Driving RV from Nevada to Oregon

October 9, 2024. rswfire is in his RV at 6 AM, preparing to leave a mountain campground in eastern Nevada. He has been stationary for a week and two days. His ear piercings are still healing and sore. He's dealing with a mouse in his RV insulation and desperately needs a shower. The drive will take him through remote Nevada towns to the Oregon border.

Energetic Signature

resolute with underlying tension

Field State

threshold crossing

Orientation

toward geographic and relational sovereignty

01J9QFS1C0YMDTPJK1J5QH9X5P

October 9, 2024

67:43

View on YouTube

Author

rswfire

Status

ARCHIVED

Type

TRANSMISSION (CAPTURE)

Temperature

0.00

[0:17]good morning fellow humans so it's 6 o00

[0:21]here and I going to be heading down this

[0:23]mountain this morning and heading to the

[0:26]Nevada Oregon border

[0:30]H to a very rustic Campground they do

[0:32]have a shower there which I desperately

[0:34]need I have been cleaning myself with

[0:36]these Oil of Olay face wipes that um get

[0:41]real soapy and stuff atast says high and

[0:46]it works but I wouldn't say it's a

[0:48]perfect solution I haven't been able to

[0:50]wash my hair really I'm having to keep

[0:52]my earrings protected you know they're

[0:55]still healing they're still a little bit

[0:56]sore

[0:58]so oh I had to really love a shower the

[1:01]closest one here was an hour and a half

[1:03]away and that meant a 3-hour drive

[1:07]so um I mean I did say I was going to do

[1:11]the bucket method I didn't get around to

[1:13]that eventually I will incorporate

[1:15]something like that into my life it

[1:17]seems to be how it

[1:18]works um it took me a month to empty my

[1:21]tanks the first time and since then it's

[1:23]very

[1:24]easy Once I do a thing you

[1:27]know it's a different story but I

[1:30]haven't done that yet

[1:32]so oh man I slept well um I woke up a

[1:36]few times um I'm pretty sure I could

[1:39]hear that little field mouse he's in

[1:41]here

[1:42]somewhere and I'm pretty sure he's in

[1:44]the insulation that I put in underneath

[1:47]of my sinks and you know all the stuff

[1:49]over here on the side um the first thing

[1:52]I did when I bought my RV heard a little

[1:55]bit of scratching like oh man I'm going

[1:58]to have to deal with that you know if he

[2:01]doesn't come out to eat

[2:02][Music]

[2:04]soon and get stuck in that little trap I

[2:07]made then

[2:09]um I'm going to have to start pulling

[2:11]panels out and on my insulation and

[2:14]finding this thing so hope he comes out

[2:18]maybe the the drive will bring him out I

[2:21]don't know we've got it's about a 5 hour

[2:24]drive it is pretty far cuz I'm pretty

[2:27]much heading from the Eastern side of

[2:29]Nevada

[2:30]to um the Northwestern side

[2:34]so um I'm doing very good I'm ready for

[2:37]this IB Mele is you know how he

[2:41]is

[2:44]um

[2:45][Music]

[2:47]so it's I don't know it's going to be an

[2:50]interesting day like

[2:51]I I took a little pause a week and two

[2:54]days

[2:57]and I like it here I was outside this

[3:00]morning looking up at the stars so

[3:02]beautiful a little cold quite windy out

[3:05]there and probably in the 40s but that's

[3:08]what I'm going to experience when I'm in

[3:10]Oregon right only with rain so probably

[3:15]colder you know more wind I don't know

[3:18]so I I'm looking forward to finding

[3:20]out and I will adapt

[3:24]because I was exploring with AI this

[3:28]morning this week's videos versus my

[3:31]very first

[3:32]video and it's quite a

[3:35]transformation at that time I was

[3:37]actually seeking some community on here

[3:39]but I once I discovered how different I

[3:42]am from everybody else it no longer made

[3:45]sense cuz I knew how incompatible we

[3:47]are and I'm getting a little frustrated

[3:50]by some of the comments I get

[3:53]and you know I know I said maybe it's a

[3:55]me thing and this is true but it's also

[3:57]a you thing you know there multiple

[4:00]truths can they you know they're both

[4:02]true um High set a boundary and no one

[4:06]respects it it's like I just don't

[4:09]understand that why are people that way

[4:12]but you

[4:13]know I'm going to enforce my sovereignty

[4:16]because I've I did what I set out to do

[4:20]very proud of

[4:21]myself I have transformed my life and

[4:25]I'm going to

[4:27]continue down the path that I

[4:30]think is right for me and if people

[4:34]don't respect my boundaries they'll just

[4:36]be blocked and I don't care how long

[4:39]you've been following me I will block

[4:41]you if you don't respect my boundaries

[4:43]and what that is very simple don't give

[4:45]me advice don't do it

[4:49]simple

[4:53]um I'm not asking for advice I keep

[4:56]saying this and I don't know why that

[4:58]message isn't getting through to

[4:59]somebody you because this isn't

[5:01]complicated it's very

[5:04]simple if you want to follow my journey

[5:07]you're welcome to you but you're going

[5:09]to respect my

[5:10]boundaries you should actually feel bad

[5:13]that you're not because it's just not

[5:17]right so I'm not as frustrated as I

[5:20]sound I

[5:22]just it irritates

[5:25]me because I'm always respectful to

[5:28]other people

[5:30]and it is a lack of respect when you

[5:32]violate my

[5:34]boundaries so I do have some things to

[5:36]do in

[5:39]here um not a whole lot you know but I

[5:43]need to get ready this morning and get

[5:45]my Jeep hitch up and you know we'll head

[5:48]out soon an hour or two so I was

[5:51]thinking last night I'm going to get rid

[5:53]of this desk just get a small table big

[5:56]enough for my monitor my keyboard and

[5:58]mouse that way I got all this this room

[6:00]here cuz I want easier access to my

[6:04]solar power

[6:06]station I just want to do something down

[6:08]here that's a little easier I can't use

[6:10]any of this stuff anymore when I'm off

[6:13]grid cuz my plugs don't

[6:15]work so I've been thinking through all

[6:17]of that I'm this is up on the slide the

[6:20]slide is always in of course maybe I

[6:23]could even get away with getting rid of

[6:25]that chair

[6:28]there um cuz this in the way and maybe

[6:31]have a folding chair if it's just if I

[6:34]got a table that's a little bit shorter

[6:36]than a normal table cuz then that would

[6:39]bring it to the right

[6:40]height it's kind of what I've been

[6:43]thinking you may notice when I wear my

[6:45]hats now it's not perfectly symmetrical

[6:47]that's cuz I'm protecting my earrings

[6:49]over here they're still getting

[6:52]better and I can't put any pressure on

[6:55]them wow I was going to transfer my

[6:57]files to my laptop this thing doesn't

[7:00]have any space I'm gonna have some work

[7:02]to do on this

[7:05]thing fortunately I am a techn file

[7:08]there's always a

[7:10]solution we're off Jeep is hooked up and

[7:14]we're ready to

[7:15]go there's my beautiful

[7:17]Jeep just in the parking lot here to

[7:21]head down this mountain we going to put

[7:23]you in my lap because I need to

[7:26]concentrate this is a first for me so

[7:30]got to keep these off my earrings it's

[7:32]little

[7:35]hard I think we got

[7:39]this Bailey's a little freaked out which

[7:42]stresses me out

[7:44]but I can do about that c all

[7:54]righty this stupid parking brake does

[7:56]not work so well all right

[8:01]all right

[8:07]here okay everything looks

[8:10]good we're heading down a

[8:13]mountain

[8:15]wow all right we got this though we got

[8:19]this turn left on National Forest 098

[8:23]then take the first left

[8:33]we had fun here enjoyed this place I

[8:37]like this

[8:38]mountain I like

[8:41]mountains turn left on revada 231

[8:45]Explore

[8:47]More it's pretty bright out that sun was

[8:51]wrong time of day to be doing

[8:53]this we'll see how it

[8:56]goes so we're going to go real slow

[8:59]I am very heavy piece of Machinery plus

[9:02]a

[9:03]Jeep we're just going to take this in

[9:06]three and 3/4 miles turn right on Nevada

[9:09]231 going to get down into second gear

[9:13]here

[9:15]okay there's no reason to go

[9:20]fast hang in there Bailey we got this

[9:29]I have a full tank of gas so there's no

[9:33]reason to really stop in town I need to

[9:34]get propane I'm at like 50% after a week

[9:38]and I was using the generator and

[9:41]heat don't feel like I need it

[9:45]desperately

[9:47]so maybe I'll find a way a place on the

[9:50]of the

[9:52]way all right let's see how we do

[9:55]here using The Brak so kind of want to

[10:00]not use the brake as much as possible

[10:02]just CU I don't

[10:03]know exactly how that

[10:08]works so I'm not going to ride the brake

[10:11]but I'll use them when I need

[10:14]to have some faith I

[10:17]guess it's a bright

[10:24]Sun all

[10:27]right I could even go into first first I

[10:29]think I don't know yeah we're going over

[10:32]we're going 25 just going down this

[10:34]little part here okay we're in first now

[10:37]oh it don't like that okay we'll avoid

[10:40]that unless we're going real

[10:41][Music]

[10:44]slow okay let me

[10:56]though let's get some fres here

[11:01]mey tried to escape he knew we were

[11:05]leaving

[11:06]today that

[11:10]cat had to explain to him that that's he

[11:14]got arm boundaries

[11:16]too I am

[11:18]over accommodating other people and

[11:21]things truly I

[11:24]am all right first curve this is the

[11:27]long one but wearn that side of the road

[11:30]so it doesn't feel as

[11:32]bad but I was thinking about it it

[11:34]depends where you are on the path

[11:36]sometimes we will be on the

[11:38]edge this is not so bad wow it looks

[11:41]beautiful down

[11:43]there

[11:47]wow I'm coming back because I want to

[11:51]explore

[11:52]Nevada but I do think that Oregon has

[11:54]something to offer

[11:57]me and I'm going to start there I'm want

[12:03]to both places speak to me in different

[12:05]ways but I think I would love a shower

[12:09]let me tell you something I would love a

[12:12]shower so

[12:14]we're we're going I don't care how

[12:16]rustic it is I don't care if it's cold

[12:21]water yeah hopefully it's a little

[12:23]easier in Oregon or I'm going to have to

[12:25]learn to bathe myself with a bucket

[12:31]okay that feels too fast we're slowing

[12:35]down

[12:41]interesting oh that sun is baking

[12:47]me I messed up my glasses I was sitting

[12:50]on them didn't realize it I couldn't fix

[12:52]them

[12:54]right so they're kind of slanted

[12:59]all right it is protecting my

[13:05]earrings going down this

[13:08]mountain yes we are this is not bad at

[13:17]all okay picking up

[13:20]speed we don't want that we're in second

[13:23]gear why are you picking up speed

[13:30]my faithful Jeep in the

[13:33]back my favorite thing on

[13:40]earth oh we're going to get some fresh

[13:42]air the air is so thin up

[13:47]there oh I figured out what the

[13:49]squeaking was it's my uh my desk so I

[13:54]was just talking about how I might

[13:55]replace that but if I don't well I'm

[13:58]going to I know me I've already made up

[14:00]my

[14:01]mind I just want a small

[14:05]table clear up some room in there that I

[14:08]do other things

[14:12]with still got a ways to

[14:19]go oh this thing yeah we're at 7700

[14:22]elevation yeah we still got ways to

[14:25]go wow

[14:29]surprising okay so this little

[14:33]bumpy take that real

[14:37]slow got some people over

[14:40][Music]

[14:41]here just hanging

[14:48]out yeah this is easy all right we're

[14:51]going to be on the edge for a

[14:53]while um I don't think it feels as bad

[14:56]here oh yes it does w wow wow that is

[14:59]just like there's oh man wow not afraid

[15:04]though just like that's quite a few

[15:07]that's quite a that's an interesting

[15:09]little spot

[15:13]there

[15:15]um I mean I got everything packed away

[15:18]but I still feel like this is a a

[15:21]process that I need to

[15:24]improve I don't like moving stuff around

[15:26]just cuz I'm moving I don't like that

[15:31]this is not how I want to live I will

[15:32]figure it

[15:34]out always adapting always

[15:37]iterating always

[15:41]tinkering going down the

[15:43][Music]

[15:45]mountain we got a long drive

[15:49]today that's okay though oh little fast

[15:52]slow down

[15:54]rvy mercedesbenz Sprinter

[16:02]very all right we're

[16:06]good and the sun

[16:08]again let's see we're heading west so

[16:12]the sun shouldn't be in our

[16:14]base on the

[16:17]road that'll be good that'll be

[16:25]nice yeah this is no big deal we got

[16:32]not the experience I was expecting to be

[16:34]honest with

[16:36]you this feels like just driving really

[16:40]it's at a slower

[16:46]speed oh I hear one of my favorite songs

[16:54][Music]

[16:59]uh uh uh

[17:00]uh okay there's a cliff over

[17:05]here 20 mil per hour that's The Sweet

[17:08]Spot even in my

[17:11]RV if I told you wh I did before I do

[17:16]how I used to

[17:18]be would you go along with someone like

[17:25]me if we would forward I heard little

[17:32]history would you go along with someone

[17:36]like

[17:46]me I would go along with someone like

[17:53]you doesn't matter what we

[17:56]do we're going to

[18:04][Music]

[18:07]and we don't care about the young

[18:10]folks talking about the young

[18:13]stars and we don't care about the

[18:16]old talk about old

[18:21]star

[18:23]the talk about the Old ST

[18:29]is talking talking about me and

[18:38]you I'm going to miss you Mountain

[18:41]you're [ __ ]

[18:43]amazing I'm coming

[18:47]back we're going to

[18:50]do something off grid next time not

[18:53]being on that Campground so many people

[18:55]came and

[18:56]went all right slow

[19:00]down thank

[19:03][Music]

[19:04]you going on hey oh my garment thought I

[19:10]said something

[19:12]stupidly thank

[19:16]you doesn't matter what we

[19:19]do we're going in one half mile turn

[19:23]right on Nevada

[19:25]231 really that's half a mile no oh

[19:29]that's not right oh wait we're on one

[19:32]road this thing's

[19:39][Music]

[19:44]stupid about

[19:46]the talking about

[19:53]the talking about me and

[19:56]you man that Mom here's that other

[19:59]Mountain so

[20:10]cool turn right on Nevada

[20:13]231 it's one road like I don't know what

[20:16]you're on

[20:18]about everybody

[20:20]talking talking about me and

[20:26]you you

[20:33]all right I'm sorry I couldn't let you

[20:35]watch but I really wanted to be cautious

[20:37]continue on Nevada 231 oh that was

[20:40]important we're leaving the forest the

[20:44]national forest it's up here somewhere

[20:48]there's someone camping in the parking

[20:49]lot they've been there a couple days

[20:51]it's kind of remarkable really all right

[20:53]let me fix my gears

[20:55]here okay

[21:02]they're just camping there they got all

[21:03]their stuff on that's the parking lot to

[21:06]the

[21:08]campground I don't know what to think

[21:10]about it to be honest with you I know I

[21:12]wouldn't do

[21:14]it all

[21:22]right I am back on the

[21:25]road yay

[21:29]all right here's where the force ends I

[21:31]will talk to you guys when something

[21:32]inspires me oh by the way I learned that

[21:37]my I check this this morning when I'm

[21:40]driving my house batteries are being

[21:42]charged so maybe if I just move every

[21:45]single day or something keep those

[21:47]stupid things charged up thought they

[21:50]might but I wasn't sure and it's

[21:52]interesting because it's adaptive my

[21:54]microwave not

[21:55]on so somehow

[21:59]that

[22:00]thing I mean it's kind of smart I think

[22:02]that's really cool

[22:06][Music]

[22:40]there your head

[22:47][Music]

[22:55]uned your head out of the bed

[23:01]oh I'd rather

[23:03]die I'd rather

[23:06]die that to be with you

[23:17][Music]

[23:30]your world is dying and you're watching

[23:33]a YouTube

[23:33][Music]

[23:47]video take

[23:49]me take me on the way

[23:55][Music]

[23:58]bring me to the

[24:00]fire the other

[24:05][Music]

[24:14][Music]

[24:24]way Show Me Love

[24:31]hand the

[24:35]now I'd rather

[24:38]die I'd rather

[24:41]die than to be with you

[24:50][Music]

[25:05][Music]

[25:14][Music]

[25:27]we've reached open con which is a very

[25:29]interesting little

[25:32]place this is as far as I went while my

[25:35]while I was here I came here almost

[25:37]every

[25:43]day can't say that

[25:45]I enjoyed it

[25:48]here people were not very

[25:55]friendly just didn't have a good vibe to

[25:57]it to be honest

[26:05]so I guess I won't miss

[26:07]it there was one person here who I

[26:10]thought was pretty

[26:12]awesome so I drove into there's a little

[26:15]town next to Elco I forget what it's

[26:19]called time my M no um anyways there's a

[26:23]hardware store there I had to go there

[26:25]twice the first time I went there was to

[26:27]get

[26:29]that plug for

[26:32]my so that I could charge my

[26:38]solar so I could charge my RV for my so

[26:41]sorry I don't know I'm a little

[26:42]distracted I guess um and she was

[26:45]helpful and friendly and then I had to

[26:46]go back because of the mouse and she was

[26:48]outside smoking as I pulled out and I

[26:51]got out she saw me she's like oh what do

[26:53]you need now and I told her there's a

[26:55]mouse in my arm oh come with me and she

[26:58]went in the store with me put her

[26:59]cigarette out came in and took me right

[27:01]to the mouse trps she tried to give me

[27:04]one that would kill them though I didn't

[27:06]notice until I started to pay for it so

[27:09]I went and got a different one but she

[27:10]was cool I liked

[27:12]her and then there were some other

[27:14]things that happened in town so when I

[27:16]was paying for those bous traps there

[27:18]was this young guy who was a cashier he

[27:21]had to be in his 20s and when he was

[27:24]giving me

[27:25]change he needed to give me some

[27:27]quarters he had a roll of quarters and

[27:28]he asked the person next to him how do I

[27:30]open these up like he didn't know how to

[27:33]open a roll of

[27:34]quarters and before that I went to um

[27:40]return that power that battery charger

[27:44]and there was this guy working there and

[27:47]he had door Dash delivered to him first

[27:49]thing in the morning like this man does

[27:51]not have time for breakfast he's

[27:52]ordering door Dash and Alo I couldn't

[27:54]believe that I was kind of surprised by

[27:56]this and then when he had to give me my

[27:59]change for the cost of that thing it was

[28:02]hundred and something he couldn't do it

[28:04]he he literally could not added up he

[28:06]was sitting there trying to do it and

[28:08]then he was like I'm not good at math so

[28:10]I had to help him I had to tell him what

[28:11]to give me this man was in his 30s

[28:15]easily and I just those two things

[28:20]happened within an hour of each other

[28:22]and I just was like what is happening

[28:24]here before that I went to another store

[28:28]different hardware store the man there

[28:31]was just rude you could just tell he was

[28:33]homophobic and you know I'm always

[28:36]having to navigate that in this life I

[28:39]got these earrings knowing that that

[28:41]would only make it worse cuz I guess

[28:46]they see earrings they think gay man and

[28:48]then they start

[28:50]acting hosle and

[28:54]just but I'm not going to hide who I am

[28:56]I never you know I stopped doing that

[28:58]that when I came out I learned that

[29:00]hiding

[29:01]yourself is is poison there's nothing

[29:04]worse you can do and that is why I think

[29:07]I'm as authentic as I am because I

[29:08]learned a valuable lesson when I came

[29:11]out there's nothing to hide there's

[29:13]nothing about myself that needs

[29:15]hiding so I had

[29:18]nothing people think that

[29:20]that's about um vulnerability it's not

[29:25]actually because I don't feel vulnerable

[29:27]I'm not trying to be vulnerable I'm

[29:30]not feeling like I have to protect

[29:33]myself if someone misunderstands or

[29:35]misinterprets me or or whatever it

[29:37]doesn't whatever it is I'm not thinking

[29:39]about those things I'm just being myself

[29:42]that's authenticity that's not

[29:45]vulnerability most people hide

[29:48]themselves yeah that's one of the ways

[29:50]you fragment yourself back to my point

[29:52]that woman it just felt like she was

[29:54]looking out for me like she just had

[29:56]this vibe to her where she's like I'm

[29:57]going to to help this guy like like she

[30:00]was just looking out for me and that was

[30:02]very cool I I like people like

[30:05]that and she did it

[30:08]in in a way that works for me she wasn't

[30:11]like like when I was at that one place I

[30:12]don't remember where what state this was

[30:14]or whatever but when I went to that

[30:16]hardware store and this there was a

[30:17]woman there and she was just like

[30:20]telling me all the things I should

[30:23]do

[30:25]like my um GPS fell down by the way and

[30:29]that was based on her

[30:31]advice and so obviously that didn't work

[30:33]out I couldn't put my dash cam up

[30:36]because of her idea didn't work either

[30:38]you know like she just was giving me all

[30:41]this advice that I didn't ask for didn't

[30:43]want I wasn't getting advice from this

[30:45]other woman I told her what I wanted and

[30:47]she helped me find it and you could just

[30:48]tell that she genuinely wanted help and

[30:52]I I respect people like that and want to

[30:56]honor them

[31:03]oh we're going through a

[31:10]tunnel oh no we're going around the are

[31:12]we going through a tunnel I think we

[31:15]are a I think we're going around that

[31:18]tunnel

[31:20][Music]

[31:22]a all right we got a KN tour going on

[31:33]all right I got to deal with that this

[31:35]is awesome we're just taking a little

[31:37]bit of a detour we're going around the

[31:49]tunnel very

[31:54]beautiful but I'm ready for Oran

[31:59]I am I'm ready for

[32:06]orgon it's around the

[32:11]tunnel there's nothing out

[32:15]there or

[32:19]just driving through the

[32:21]desert got some mountains around us

[32:26]but these mountains aren't speaking to

[32:29]me so much

[32:30]today I got three more hours to

[32:36]go might stay there a few days just to

[32:38]kind of get my

[32:40]bearings I feel like my place needs a

[32:42]little bit of

[32:45]work um I'm not going to stay too long

[32:48]if I

[32:52]do stop here and

[32:54]then you know I'll be very close to the

[32:57]border so second I leave there I'll be

[32:59]in

[33:00]Oregon will have made it to my

[33:04]destination if you can call it a

[33:06]destination it's very interesting thing

[33:08]going on over

[33:13]there almost looks like a

[33:16]canal I can see a

[33:22]phoenix

[33:23]so I'm still not taking CLA it's been 3

[33:27]weeks I think I didn't take it the whole

[33:30]week I was on that mount

[33:35]so I don't take any

[33:39]medications I stopped taking tramad all

[33:41]after about a month of being on the road

[33:44]quick hold turkey that was very

[33:47]hard very

[33:49]difficult but I got through

[33:52]it sto taking

[33:55]clopin and

[34:00]I think that there might

[34:02]be I don't know why that happened I

[34:05]think there might

[34:06]be a little bit more anxiety than normal

[34:10]but that might stabilize

[34:12]or um

[34:16]maybe I feel like if I were to improve

[34:19]my health like eat better stop drinking

[34:22]M do stuff like that maybe maybe that

[34:25]will be the difference I need but I'm

[34:27]not going

[34:29]to I don't want crotches

[34:33]anymore don't need

[34:36]them I'm out here in the

[34:39]world driving my home to

[34:47]organ that is the most ostentatious RV

[34:50]God I hate those

[34:52]things they just oh they set me off

[34:55]every time I see one

[34:59]like

[35:02]why I'm just I'll stop there I'm

[35:05]not I got 3 hours to

[35:08]go from my point of view medications

[35:11]were a way too numb myself from the

[35:17]world to make it feel more manageable to

[35:20]live in such a fragmented world and it

[35:24]just it didn't make me happy obviously

[35:27]you know

[35:28]know so I'm talking about it

[35:33]because maybe you feel the same

[35:36]way I'm liking this

[35:38]view feels almost

[35:42]ethereal got mountains

[35:44]and hidden by fog over there with train

[35:49]going the same speed I am pretty much

[35:51]cuz I'm not catching up to it M over

[35:54]here we just passed Battle Mountain

[35:58]maybe it's the same range I don't

[36:00]know very curious about that place

[36:03]because you don't generally name a place

[36:05]like that unless something happened in

[36:07]the past and I guess they want to

[36:10]honor a battle probably

[36:14]between westerners and the indigenous

[36:19]people

[36:23]which yeah one day we'll talk about that

[36:27]I didn't take any video of it but I wish

[36:29]I had there was a train running parallel

[36:33]to us for quite a while it just got me

[36:36]thinking about my youth when I was young

[36:38]like 17 to maybe

[36:41]20 somewhere in that range I would walk

[36:44]down railroad tracks for Miles 10 20 30

[36:48]miles there were times I remember living

[36:51]in

[36:52]Michigan trying to take a railroad track

[36:54]all the way to Toronto Canada

[36:58]then make lights I

[37:02]tried and I would just walk these tracks

[37:06]and it never really crossed my mind to

[37:08]just hop on a train that never it just

[37:10]never crossed my mind like I just and I

[37:13]think it's

[37:16]because I really do have this thing

[37:18]where I have to be in control of myself

[37:21]and my

[37:22]environment and I would had to surrender

[37:24]to that train if I had jumped on it

[37:28]I'd rather just take the railroad

[37:30]tracks and I think that there is a

[37:32]parallel between that experience what

[37:35]I'm doing

[37:36]now living in an RV driving down this

[37:42]highway you guys don't understand how

[37:46]much value I find being a

[37:55]bone it's difficult to

[38:00]describe like there's a part of me

[38:02]that's always open to connection but I

[38:05]know myself very well and I know that

[38:08]most

[38:09]people who come from a fragmented place

[38:12]will just add tension to my life so I

[38:15]avoid it I'll walk down railroad tracks

[38:18]10 20 30 miles by

[38:22]myself or you know Drive hundreds of

[38:25]miles in this RV

[38:28]to get somewhere very desolate with

[38:31]hopefully a

[38:33]shower because I am very

[38:37]comfortable by

[38:42]myself when I have an

[38:46]issue I just sit with it I let it be

[38:50]because I resolve things holistically

[38:52]and with my

[38:54]intuition my intuition is a driving

[38:56]force in my life because I trust it I

[38:58]trust my emotions my intuition my

[39:01]intellect my ethical framework all of

[39:04]these things are interconnected for

[39:07]me and I have a relational non-dualistic

[39:10]mindset which I

[39:13]know is foreign to most of you you you

[39:17]just can't you can't

[39:22]understand when I have to decide

[39:25]something I don't

[39:27]look at it the way you

[39:31]do that's why I really have a problem

[39:34]when people try to give me advice cuz

[39:37]I'm I'm not asking for it and I know I

[39:39]keep returning to this but it's that's

[39:41]how much it frustrates me that people

[39:45]are always trying to

[39:47]impose their world view on to

[39:51]me when I didn't ask for

[39:54]it I'm trying to share my life with the

[39:57]world in

[40:00]general and all I get in return are

[40:04]these narrow points of view where people

[40:05]try to dissect my life into little

[40:07]little things

[40:12]like you cannot take one piece of

[40:17]me and and try to give me advice around

[40:21]that because you are not seeing the

[40:23]interconnections when I decide if I'm

[40:25]going to stay in Nevada or head on to or

[40:29]organ that is a very complicated process

[40:32]that you cannot be involved

[40:35]in

[40:37]I sit with it

[40:39]holistically until the answer comes to

[40:42]me until all the pieces of me are in

[40:44]alignment with each other so there's a

[40:46]synthesis a

[40:48]Harmony and when you impose your point

[40:51]of view on

[40:53]me you are just adding

[41:00]disharmony because of the way you

[41:02]approach

[41:05]life I know this is hard to understand

[41:07]it is hard for me to

[41:12]describe I'll be honest I'm thinking it

[41:14]was a mistake turning comments back on I

[41:17]actually was very happy with them being

[41:20]off turned them back on

[41:22]because part of me was just kind of

[41:25]curious you know who was still around

[41:27]and how are they doing but I haven't

[41:29]actually gotten much of that so it's

[41:31]probably kind of

[41:33]pointless

[41:36]um there's H one

[41:45]here

[41:49]I I

[41:53]suppose you know I suppose I should just

[41:55]turn comments off honestly

[41:58]there's a few of you out there that I

[41:59]actually gave a damn about but I haven't

[42:02]actually heard from you so

[42:05]um probably moved on when I asked

[42:07]everybody to so no hard

[42:12]feelings

[42:14]just I'm not going

[42:17]to I'm not going to find connection this

[42:20]way right so I just I

[42:23]got my phone is killing me um

[42:31]the limited amount of connection I need

[42:34]I will find in other ways because it's

[42:37]not going to be through YouTube because

[42:40]all I get from YouTube is just

[42:44][ __ ] I'll be honest with you

[42:48]I often think to myself I would respect

[42:52]you more if you were not watching my

[42:54]channel and the reason I feel that way

[42:57]is because you shouldn't be watching

[42:59]YouTube I think YouTube is just another

[43:03]drug another way to be distracted and

[43:08]tune out from

[43:13]life you know I'm not judging cuz there

[43:16]are times I'll I'll watch YouTube you

[43:19]know or I'll play video games or

[43:20]whatever but I definitely don't make

[43:23]that my

[43:24]life and it feels like some people do

[43:28]and I don't understand

[43:30]that but it's also clear to me that a

[43:35]whole kind of this is kind of

[43:38]complicated area here I'm navigating

[43:41]there's some road

[43:44]construction

[43:46]okay it feels like YouTube has evolved

[43:51]into this platform of

[43:53]distraction and

[43:55]superficiality where people are

[43:57]incapable of

[44:00]having absorbing anything that they

[44:02]watch

[44:05]honestly we're like on the side of the

[44:08]road

[44:10]here went to

[44:14]construction

[44:19]um yeah this is a little saer

[44:24]this all right construction was getting

[44:26]pretty bad there

[44:28]we even in and out of these

[44:31]Lanes

[44:37]um my thoughts are complicated in nuan

[44:41]like

[44:43]even with what I said there are other

[44:45]angles and

[44:51]um I mean on the other hand I'm glad

[44:53]you're watching my channel and I hope

[44:55]that you learned something from it right

[44:56]so it's just as there are many different

[44:59]layers to me

[45:00]that which is another thing so when you

[45:03]respond to something I'm saying you're

[45:05]only responding to one layer of what I

[45:08]might even be thinking at that

[45:10]time we are not

[45:16]alike and I think it's probably best

[45:18]just to turn comments off because I just

[45:20]don't that's

[45:22]it's I want to document my journey I do

[45:25]that for myself I do that that for the

[45:28]potential that it helped

[45:31]others

[45:33]and they're going down the mountain I

[45:39]just I made a mistake turning the back

[45:45]on when I walk down those railroad

[45:50]tracks I would look at the houses along

[45:53]the way like cuz I'd be walking pretty

[45:55]late at night sometimes and like there

[45:57]was just a certain energy and

[46:00]Vibe um a

[46:02]Stillness and you would just see these

[46:04]houses kind of

[46:06]like in these remote places and I would

[46:08]just imagine the lives in

[46:11]there not in any kind of voyeuristic way

[46:14]just

[46:17]um just I have a Natural Curiosity

[46:21]about the world but I also form a

[46:24]Detachment I don't want to get too close

[46:26]to it

[46:31]that's the th that's the thread right

[46:35]there I observe the world I participated

[46:38]in it to a degree but I do it with a

[46:42]full sense of

[46:43]sovereignty and a rejection of

[46:47]fragmentation and a

[46:50]fierce protection of my boundaries

[46:58]and that's never going to

[47:01]change as much as I was hoping that

[47:03]maybe I would connect with some people

[47:06]through my channel 7 months now you know

[47:10]I haven't found anyone that

[47:27]and I don't think I will so just going

[47:30]to leave it that so I'm in

[47:34]wamaka ass I'm pronouncing that right I

[47:36]don't know this place is pretty cool I

[47:39]would love to spend some time

[47:41]here trying to find a fuel station but I

[47:44]think I didn't find

[47:46]it so now I'm going to have to hope that

[47:48]I find one along the way cuz I didn't

[47:50]really plot any places cuz I figured

[47:52]what's the point out

[47:55]here um

[47:58]hope I'm going the right way is not very

[48:00]clear on my GPS why are you not

[48:05]like I think we're good though this is

[48:08]an interesting

[48:10]place fascinating little

[48:13]place I want to see this place again

[48:17]someday got Parks over there

[48:20]maybe what a fascinating place

[48:27]it's not too busy but it's very kind of

[48:29]big and

[48:32]like

[48:34]wow I'd love to learn about this place I

[48:37]think something about this place we're

[48:40]driving down a solitary road now it said

[48:44]next service is 65 miles just to warn

[48:48]you but we're good I just I found a fuel

[48:51]stop on the way I got a full

[48:53]tank we're traveling like

[48:57]this is

[48:59]cool don't quote me on this for

[49:01]certainty but I'm pretty sure this is

[49:03]the road that leads into Oregon it's 140

[49:06]I think it runs all the way through

[49:08]Nevada into

[49:11]Oregon all the way to the coast pretty

[49:16]much this is so

[49:19]cool I am so

[49:22]close there is something calling me

[49:25]there

[49:27]rest of the little place in Nevada

[49:28]though was kind of

[49:30]nice get lost

[49:32]here man I got to slow down

[49:36]this hill or mountain is speeding me up

[49:40]so my little um solution to the the

[49:45]slide of the pipe insulation it was

[49:47]coming out while I was driving

[49:49]and pull that out and I can tell now

[49:53]looking at it from this

[49:55]perspective that's a clear entrance in

[49:57]for a

[49:58]Ms I got to solve that somehow just got

[50:02]to if I can I'm taking it up though CU

[50:05]I'm not I don't want to deal with this

[50:07]stupid

[50:08]slide so yeah that is so cool it looks

[50:12]like we're just going to head in between

[50:13]some mountains

[50:17]there may it's getting tired of the

[50:21]driving still got 56 miles to go this is

[50:24]one long road

[50:27]been traveling down it for almost 40

[50:28]miles absolutely loving this I've seen

[50:31]maybe five vehicles two of them RV

[50:34]leaving Oregon I

[50:36]assume going the other

[50:38]way so maybe I pick the right time and

[50:42]season for

[50:43]this very

[50:45]excited so I've decided we're going to

[50:48]Oregon today Lake View is only 100 miles

[50:52]from here um before somewhere between

[50:55]the Nevada border and Lake VI I think

[50:57]I'll find somewhere that I can just

[50:58]chill for the night and just keep

[51:01]heading towards the coast so I'm not

[51:03]even stopping at this Campground I'm

[51:05]going to keep

[51:06]going these are some beautiful mountains

[51:09]I'm curious what formed them you can see

[51:11]like those

[51:12]patterns I mean those are patterns over

[51:15]geological time frames

[51:19]that are quite amazing these are pretty

[51:23]mountains that's amazing that's like a

[51:25]river of vegetation or something so

[51:31]pretty looks like there might be water

[51:33]in the distance L that's a

[51:35]marage wonder what this is I don't

[51:37]actually know it's so

[51:40]pretty okay it's a dried up lake bed

[51:44]that's kind of sad maybe it's maybe it's

[51:46]a seasonal Lake I don't know but you can

[51:48]see it's a lake from my GPS it's shows

[51:50]in this water that is so cool I'm

[51:54]somewhere near Dano Junction that's

[51:56]that's all I know quite to view down

[51:59]there we're heading up a

[52:05]mountain I've been on this highway for

[52:07]almost 90

[52:09]miles probably getting close to

[52:13]Oregon so I'm just taking a break at

[52:17]this little rest area here that's the

[52:20]rest area I just threw my trash out oh

[52:23]that's

[52:24]funny that's a nice tree

[52:29]it's quite quiet out

[52:33]here there haven't been that many

[52:39]vehicles I think that's where I was

[52:41]staying was planning to stay actually is

[52:43]over

[52:44]there there is a campground

[52:47]there which would mean a shower

[52:54]housee it doesn't look very BS that's

[52:57]for sure I don't see anything over there

[53:00]maybe I'll go check it

[53:02]out but I really want to get to

[53:06]Oregon wow what's Happening

[53:11]Here Is it supposed to do

[53:17]that Wonder know what that's

[53:21]about so yeah I'm ready to get to Oregon

[53:25]but I just want to take a break

[53:27]and um just look things up on a map cuz

[53:29]I have no idea where I am or how far

[53:31]away I am or anything like that so give

[53:34]baile a break and just chill for a

[53:37]little bit but it's getting later in the

[53:40]day um I'll need to find somewhere to

[53:43]rest before

[53:44]dark we're

[53:46]close my Cary GPS has the state border

[53:50]thing

[53:51]on doesn't mean that we're there yet

[53:54]that thing loves to come up Rather early

[53:56]for that so we're going to keep an eye

[54:00]out it's quite beautiful up here

[54:03]climbing mountains climbing up and down

[54:06]them there stay the skateboarders here

[54:10]somewhere I hope we're very

[54:14]close oh man all the way from

[54:19]Kentucky I don't even remember what day

[54:21]I left how long it's been

[54:24]nothing 63 100 ft that's not so

[54:30]bad I see I'm thinking there's still

[54:32]little ways to

[54:35]go that there is a beautiful

[54:39]sky welcoming us to Oregon we're so

[54:45]close look at

[54:49]that that is quite a VI

[55:00]just waiting for that

[55:03]sign I think this might be

[55:05]it put that sign going the other way

[55:08]says Nevada on

[55:10]it find

[55:13]out

[55:18]nope has to be

[55:21]close what's this up

[55:24]here y

[55:28]thanks for visiting

[55:33]NADA welcome to

[55:36]Oregon we're

[55:38]here o just like that your public land

[55:43]BLM

[55:46]wow we are here

[56:00]watercraft state law requires invasive

[56:02]species permit I don't know that one

[56:05]that's a new sign we're

[56:08]here oh

[56:10]man I got a range of 169 mil I think I'm

[56:14]like maybe 80 M from Lake

[56:19]meew should be good that rain goes down

[56:22]quite a lot when you're up in the

[56:23]mountains though it's kind of a little

[56:25]tricky to

[56:28]calculate sometimes really got to know

[56:31]your elevations for that oh these are

[56:34]some clear open

[56:42]lenss they have green RS

[56:46]interesting I've seen so many different

[56:48]colored

[56:54]roads we're in Oregon

[56:57]we made

[56:58]it long trip from Kentucky we are

[57:04]here oh this is awesome this is

[57:08]awesome of course this is nothing we

[57:11]just got here there are mountains and

[57:13]forests and the

[57:17]ocean beaches just so

[57:20]much so much to be

[57:23]explored we're going to be spending

[57:25]quite a long time here I

[57:37]think I'm very curious what's on the

[57:40]other side of that Horizon

[57:59]so I have no plans I do not know why I'm

[58:02]sleeping

[58:05]today I figured I'd just pull over on

[58:07]the side of the road if there's a nice

[58:09]enough pull off or rest

[58:11]area I just happened to encounter my

[58:13]phone my

[58:16]uh my celf service is not working it

[58:20]hasn't for

[58:21]hours so I get like no internet

[58:24]nothingless I bring out my Starling

[58:28]somewhere

[58:31]so just going to keep heading down this

[58:33]highway cuz this highway is taking me

[58:35]where I need to

[58:37]be no

[58:39]fear just wow I can't F my camera fast

[58:44]enough for that but

[58:46]it's

[58:48]wow

[58:52]um yeah I'm

[59:00]I definitely want to explore this

[59:03]place need to find somewhere to sleep

[59:06]for

[59:08]tonight entering Lake

[59:14]County there your remote County cuz I'm

[59:17]not seeing anything

[59:19]to this is so cool

[59:29]is warning us about a 8% downgrade the

[59:32]next 3 miles oh I could have stopped

[59:35]right there I'm looking for a place to

[59:36]just stop for the night

[59:38]now oh and I don't really want to go

[59:40]down because it's going to get

[59:44]hotter guess we're going down

[59:48]though even warning you about it with

[59:50]these little things on the road

[59:59]pretty all right let's

[60:06]downshift I mean that's not a very level

[60:08]place to be parked for the

[60:12]night all

[60:19]right wow all this open land

[60:33]okay don't like second gear when you're

[60:34]going that

[60:37]fast oh we're definitely going down

[60:39]aren't we must be going down there that

[60:42]is so cool oh my God where are we oh

[60:46]this is amazing

[61:20]wow that is so cool it's hard to show

[61:22]you that cuz you can't get on the camera

[61:25]there are multiple levels down

[61:34]there imag it's quite difficult for that

[61:36]semi to get up

[61:43]here oh that'll be difficult for us on

[61:46]the way back if we do go to that I oh I

[61:48]was going to tell

[61:49]you wow look at that road there just in

[61:52]the middle of nowhere

[61:56]that would be so

[61:57]fun it's just a little bit scary but not

[62:01]really um so where I just left in Nevada

[62:05]I actually really liked it there I might

[62:07]want to explore that

[62:12]again so I might have to come down up

[62:14]this road one

[62:21]day wonder how challenging I thought

[62:23]that will

[62:24]be 20 my

[62:32]jeam easier than it is for the semis I

[62:35]know that

[62:37]much doing its best give him a peace

[62:42]sign W

[62:51]back

[62:53]um so fast

[62:56]fasinating I really don't know anything

[62:58]about Oregon I didn't know what to

[63:00]expect I didn't even know what you call

[63:02]that what do you call that that is just

[63:05]amazing that is

[63:15]incredible no one on the roads no one

[63:20]wow it's amazing how few people I've

[63:23]seen I was expecting

[63:26]I don't know I'm a little bit worried

[63:29]that I'm going to discover that it's

[63:31]hard to live here because of

[63:33]people maybe

[63:37]not all I know is the campgrounds were

[63:39]hard to book but I don't need to live on

[63:43]campgrounds I just need to go there to

[63:46]shower and

[63:47]stuff get water empty my tanks do need

[63:51]to empty my tanks

[63:56]this is so cool oh you just cannot

[63:59]absorb this like this is too

[64:03]much need more

[64:05]time time to absorb all of this this is

[64:09]amazing oh I'm taking this with my

[64:12]Jeep maybe I don't know because we're

[64:15]going to be pretty far away from here

[64:17]unfortunately I don't know I want to do

[64:20]a lot of exploring check out the

[64:24]motorcyclist I bet that will be so fun I

[64:27]bet you are having a

[64:35]blast 3,000 RPM for this maybe I put it

[64:40]in third

[64:41]gear yeah that

[64:45]helped still pretty high still ring

[64:49]pretty

[64:51]high only going

[64:54]25 that is so cool whatever that place

[64:58]is man if I could go camping

[65:03]here okay I see a road there it looks

[65:06]like it splits in two down there I can

[65:09]see where it connects with this

[65:12]road and I remember I think it went to a

[65:16]Wide

[65:17]Circle well I probably shouldn't risk

[65:20]that in my RV should I

[65:23]man I don't know

[65:27]I want to make some upgrades on this

[65:28]thing and then maybe it'll be easier to

[65:30]do something like

[65:32]that cuz then I could just be camping

[65:35]over

[65:36]there that would be

[65:41]amazing all right let's put you in

[65:43]fourth gear cuz you're just freaking out

[65:45]on

[65:48]me not even going that

[65:52]fast all right I'm going to just put it

[65:54]in a drive

[65:58]basically

[66:02]down take some effort to pull that

[66:06]jeep to my pride and

[66:10]joy and we're off oh this is so awesome

[66:15]so awesome what does this sign

[66:22]say spotting

[66:25]reservation 19 miles down that dirt road

[66:29]oh

[66:35]my well I guess we keep going then we're

[66:38]going to go up another mile I got to

[66:41]stop at some

[66:45]point we're going to end up in Lake

[66:48]View it's getting

[66:51]late see what time it is it's 4:00

[66:55]we got a couple hours before the sun

[66:58]sets I just want to be parked by

[67:02]then this is going on for the

[67:10]night

[67:15]nice sun should be setting in an hour or

[67:17]two

[67:25]no phone service but I'll bring my

[67:27]starlink out

[67:29]and use Wi-Fi

[67:35]calling my home tonight

Summary

rswfire begins a 5-hour drive from eastern Nevada to the Oregon border, departing from a mountain campground at 6 AM. He needs a shower desperately, having been cleaning with face wipes for over a week while his new ear piercings heal. The journey involves navigating mountain roads with his RV and towed Jeep, dealing with a mouse problem in the RV insulation, and reflecting on his transformation over 7 months of travel.

**Key events during the drive:**

- Successfully navigates down mountain roads in second gear, managing the weight of RV plus Jeep

- Passes through small Nevada towns including Elko and Winnemucca, observing local people and their limitations

- Encounters homophobic treatment at hardware stores due to his earrings and gay identity

- Reflects extensively on his authentic, non-fragmented approach to life versus others' fragmented worldviews

- Discusses his decision to stop taking medications (Celexa, tramadol) after going off-grid

- Expresses frustration with YouTube commenters who give unsolicited advice, violating his clearly stated boundaries

- Considers turning comments off permanently due to lack of meaningful connection

- Crosses into Oregon after driving Highway 140 for nearly 90 miles through remote desert and mountain terrain

- Experiences dramatic elevation changes and stunning geological formations

- Ends the transmission while looking for a place to camp for the night in Oregon, having achieved his goal of reaching the state

Signal Analysis

Substrate

This transmission documents a literal and symbolic border crossing while simultaneously reinforcing sovereignty boundaries against external intrusion. The field is calibrating its relationship to connection versus isolation, using geographic movement as a mirror for internal boundary-setting processes.

Dominant Language

boundariessovereigntyfragmented/fragmentationauthenticityadviceholisticallyinterconnectedalignment

Symbolic Elements

thresholdmountaindescentrailroad tracksbordershowermouseearringsdesert

Ontological States

•
sovereign
•
transitional
•
protective
•
coherent

Subsystems

•
cognitive
•
ethical
•
relational
•
infrastructural

Transmission Details

Source Type

local

Video Quality

640 × 360 @ 30fps

Duration

67:43

Bitrate

601 kbps

Codec

avc1.4d401e