[0:07]hi
[0:08]humans it's very late I'm tired and I
[0:11]was about to go to sleep but I wanted to
[0:14]talk about something first
[0:16]so U I was chatting with AI tonight we
[0:19]were just talking about different
[0:20]cognitive Styles cuz that's a thing that
[0:22]I haven't interested in I'm learning
[0:24]about
[0:25]now and we had some insights that I want
[0:28]to share this is about
[0:31]Luna
[0:34]I haven't talked about her much since um
[0:38]giving her to the rescue to the
[0:41]shelter and I had been getting comments
[0:44]from some people saying
[0:48]that they know that
[0:53]I probably is struggling with it or
[0:56]something like this
[0:58]or um just feeling a burden from it or
[1:01]just things like that and I don't and I
[1:07]want to explain why because this is a
[1:09]key difference in our cognitive styles
[1:11]that might help you to understand me
[1:13]better this conversation helped me to
[1:16]understand more typical Styles
[1:18]better if you look at the way I process
[1:22]the world as a vend
[1:25]diagram emotions ethics thought
[1:28]processes decisions
[1:30]all of it it's just a
[1:33]circle
[1:35]that's
[1:37]that's it's how I process the
[1:40]world for more typical
[1:43]Styles bed on what a is telling
[1:46]me a lot of people when faced with a
[1:48]decision like the one I had might put
[1:50]their emotions aside they
[1:53]might because it's difficult and it's
[1:56]hard so they put their emotions aside in
[1:58]order to make that decision then they
[1:59]make the decision and
[2:02]then they might have regret afterward
[2:05]they might have second they might second
[2:07]guess their
[2:08]decision it would you know it would lead
[2:10]to this burden that people are thinking
[2:13]that I
[2:14]have but I don't work that way the day
[2:17]before I took Luna to the shelter I was
[2:21]crying I put that on video on my
[2:24]patreon uh the video of my day where
[2:27]there's just this 5sec clip
[2:30]where I'm crying it might not even be
[2:32]obvious but I wanted to honor my
[2:35]feelings that I was having that day that
[2:38]whole day I was thinking
[2:41]about how challenging it was for me to
[2:44]have her
[2:45]here how I didn't think it was the right
[2:47]environment for her her being stuck in a
[2:50]cage in a tiny
[2:53]RV how it limited her ability to grow as
[2:58]a young kitten you know she needs to be
[3:00]out and
[3:02]playing um I was
[3:04]grieving the life that I wanted to have
[3:07]with her but knew that just wasn't
[3:09]possible all of these things were
[3:11]happening to me
[3:13]simultaneously and so by the time the
[3:16]next morning came
[3:18]around there was just this this moment
[3:21]where a decision had been reached in my
[3:24]brain we need to take her to the
[3:28]shelter it was diff
[3:30]difficult but the decision was made and
[3:32]I had already processed all the
[3:36]things that are
[3:38]relevant I process the ethics of it my
[3:43]responsibility to her after taking her
[3:45]in my responsibility to myself and to
[3:48]bailing and to
[3:51]having an environment
[3:56]that was conducive to health
[4:01]and what was best for
[4:05]Luna all of those
[4:09]things were happening the day before and
[4:12]and pretty much on an ongoing basis up
[4:14]until I reached that decision and I
[4:17]don't have regrets it was the right
[4:19]decision for for all
[4:22]involved for
[4:25]others if you put those things aside I
[4:28]I'm just this is there's no judgment
[4:30]here I'm just learning about how other
[4:33]people process the world compared to
[4:35]me I can see how if you did put those
[4:39]emotions aside they're going to come
[4:41]back and they're going to just
[4:43]exacerbate the situation for others
[4:46]because they're going to they're going
[4:49]to experience guilt
[4:51]and it's just going to manifest in
[4:54]different ways whereas I processed all
[4:57]of it down to the tears that I
[5:00]had before I made that decision I didn't
[5:04]do those things after the decision I did
[5:06]them
[5:08]before that's a key difference in
[5:11]how I and many
[5:15]others engage in the
[5:19]world so my story about the
[5:26]donkey I don't know if you could revisit
[5:29]that and maybe start to understand what
[5:31]I'm trying to share there because for me
[5:35]that was a holistic process
[5:39]and none of it is separate it's all one
[5:45]thing I don't think it's possible for us
[5:48]to ever truly understand each other
[5:51]because we experience the world
[5:54]differently I can't understand you any
[5:56]better than you could understand me it
[5:58]is it is both
[6:01]sided we can understand each other
[6:04]intellectually but we can't not
[6:06]experientially I can't relate to a vend
[6:09]diagram where emotions and ethics
[6:14]and you know decisions and thought
[6:16]processes and logic and all of these
[6:19]things are separate circles that
[6:21]sometimes interact with each other in
[6:24]you know subtle ways
[6:27]or or you can change change your focus
[6:30]so that you're not dealing with that
[6:34]Circle I cannot do that everything is
[6:38]one Circle for
[6:40]me um the last thing I wanted to say
[6:44]is it doesn't
[6:47]always turn out this way some decisions
[6:51]don't have clear answers and so I've had
[6:53]to embrace ambiguity in my
[6:56]life um my S the situation with Oliver
[6:59]my cat that my mother
[7:02]has is deeply complex and
[7:06]unresolved the process of letting go of
[7:09]my relationship with my parents took me
[7:12]47 years of all of those
[7:16]things
[7:18]kesing until I could finally make that
[7:21]decision and I have never really
[7:23]questioned it
[7:27]since I don't know know if this
[7:32]helps I hope on some level it does
[7:35]because we're learning about each
[7:37]other and I actually want to keep
[7:40]learning
[7:42]about about other people who are
[7:45]different than me
[7:46]because there's value in that too it's
[7:49]not all about me it never has been I
[7:53]I've said it many times on this channel
[7:55]I'm this channel is about you just view
[7:59]through my unique perspective
[8:02][Music]
[8:05]and it's about reaching understanding
[8:08]and compassion and inspiring people and
[8:14]just trying empathy you know just trying
[8:18]to reach a place
[8:23]where whatever your cognitive style
[8:27]is we can embrace
[8:30]diversity and and the way that we
[8:32]interact in the world the way we process
[8:34]it and the differences that we
[8:40]have it's about Mutual understanding as
[8:43]much as we are able to do that which
[8:46]is always going to be a challenge but
[8:48]it's always rewarding just
[8:53]trying you guys have a wonderful night