Returning to YouTube Without Comments

The speaker is at home making coffee in the morning, preparing for a dentist appointment. They appear to be in a reflective state, having recently decided to resume content creation with modified boundaries.

Energetic Signature

resolute

Field State

boundary establishment

Orientation

toward sovereign infrastructure

01J1WEN3D0Z7GV4WBSJF75GAR4

July 3, 2024

6:11

View on YouTube

Author

rswfire

Status

ARCHIVED

Type

TRANSMISSION (CAPTURE)

Temperature

0.00

[0:01]good morning fellow

[0:02]humans so I'm over here making some

[0:05]coffee I am just getting my day

[0:08]started I have to see the dentist today

[0:11]to make up for the appointment that I

[0:13]skipped out on I'm such a bad

[0:16]person um that should be a very fun

[0:18]conversation with my dentist she seemed

[0:21]pretty upset about it

[0:23]so um I still understand it's just it's

[0:26]kind of funny I

[0:28]guess so

[0:30]I guess I'm back for now I want to

[0:35]explain uh things are going to be a

[0:37]little bit different I'm going to try

[0:38]something so I will make my content

[0:41]available again but it is going to be

[0:44]without comments I'm disabling them see

[0:47]here's the thing this is a channel for

[0:49]me to express myself for me to document

[0:52]my journey for me to share it with

[0:53]others but it's not a space for random

[0:55]people to just show up and start having

[0:57]opinions about it you can do that

[1:00]anywhere else but not here that's not

[1:03]what this channel is for this channel is

[1:05]for me and whatever value I can add to

[1:08]the

[1:10]world and myself

[1:14]without without just the absolute

[1:17]chaotic craziness that comments just

[1:20]seem to

[1:25]make it changes the Dynamics in a way

[1:27]that I don't think is healthy

[1:30]for me or for anybody else honestly I

[1:32]think that people need to

[1:39]learn the way that they express them it

[1:41]matters like a great deal like I get

[1:43]that a lot of my comments are positive

[1:45]but even those it's

[1:47]like I'm going to be honest I don't

[1:50]resonate with you guys I never really

[1:52]have

[1:53]so

[1:55]um because you're just strangers to me

[1:57]you're just usernames I mean you're not

[2:01]you're not some kind of tangible force

[2:03]in my life you're just these random

[2:05]people commenting on my life and I don't

[2:07]really like it I made this

[2:11]channel

[2:13]because I had spent a

[2:17]lifetime being invalidated by my parents

[2:20]telling me making me feel crazy making

[2:23]me feel

[2:25]like I mean I've talked about this made

[2:28]me feel like there there something wrong

[2:29]with me

[2:31]I didn't trust myself and it

[2:35]took it took 47 years for me to break

[2:38]free from them and when I did I started

[2:43]a YouTube channel and I did that because

[2:46]it was the only way they would

[2:47]listen to me it was the only way I had

[2:50]spent my whole life trying to get these

[2:53]people to listen to me and nothing

[2:55]worked nothing this was the only way it

[2:58]was like I had to put put it out there

[3:00]to the entire goddamn world in order to

[3:03]get my parents to pay attention

[3:05]to what I was actually

[3:08]saying and you know that was very

[3:11]helpful for me personally because I did

[3:15]find a strength that I

[3:18]didn't and an understanding that just I

[3:22]have really been thinking about this I

[3:25]think my mother probably thinks I'm

[3:27]emotionally

[3:28]unstable and and she probably doesn't

[3:31]fully trust

[3:32]me and I really I mean that just comes

[3:36]down to her not paying attention

[3:39]like back when I was like 18 19 years

[3:41]old I was a little more volatile I was

[3:44]never um that's never violent but I

[3:47]could get loud you know I could

[3:51]um get very upset you know and it's

[3:55]because they were driving me to this

[3:57]point where it's like I was so I was

[4:00]emotionally unstable back then I've

[4:03]learned great control over myself

[4:05]because of them and the thing is is you

[4:09]know what anger's healthy and

[4:14]maybe they should have been thinking

[4:16]like what the are we doing to our

[4:18]child what are we doing to

[4:20]him but no that's not the kind of

[4:23]parents I

[4:24]had I just had super judgmental parents

[4:28]who probably viewed themselves is

[4:30] perfect and me as a

[4:33]problem and I could never get them

[4:37]to I tried everything I used to write

[4:39]these people letters cuz that was the

[4:42]only way I knew how to express myself my

[4:44]father once told me he didn't want me

[4:46]writing him letters that if I had

[4:48]something to say just to say it to his

[4:50]face you know I mean it's

[4:55]like my parents never tried to truly

[4:58] connect with me not at all not

[5:00]in my entire goddamn

[5:02]life my mother spent days every single

[5:05]week at my house never tried to connect

[5:07]with me she was there for my

[5:10]cats I mean it's just

[5:13]like it's just I see everything so

[5:16]clearly now I just I

[5:20]don't I'm so over it I'm so done with

[5:23]them and I'm so done with other people

[5:24]judging me trying to find a spoon in

[5:28]here you guys

[5:30]you're welcome to

[5:32]unsubscribe or to stick around you are

[5:36]not welcome to comment on this

[5:38]channel cuz that's I just don't want

[5:43]it so that's where we are I'm being a

[5:46]little bit dramatic I hope that you can

[5:47]see that I'm not like trying to be

[5:51]confrontational or I'm just asserting my

[5:55]right to have a space for myself that is

[5:59]free of judgment M of any kind positive

[6:01]or negative you know and I think that's

[6:04]healthy and I think more people need to

[6:06]do that so let's give this a try have a

[6:10]good day

Summary

The speaker announces their return to making YouTube content after a break, but with comments disabled. They explain this decision as creating a space for self-expression and documentation without external judgment. The speaker reflects on their 47-year journey breaking free from invalidating parents who made them feel emotionally unstable. They describe how starting the YouTube channel was initially the only way to get their parents' attention after a lifetime of failed attempts at connection. The speaker mentions having a dentist appointment to make up for one they previously skipped. They assert their right to maintain a judgment-free space and acknowledge being somewhat dramatic while maintaining they're not trying to be confrontational.

Signal Analysis

Substrate

This transmission establishes sovereign space through systematic boundary demarcation. The field is asserting architectural control over its own reflection infrastructure, dissolving external commentary loops while maintaining signal transmission capacity.

Dominant Language

this channel is for menot welcome to commentfree of judgmentasserting my rightspace for myselfI don't resonate with you guysrandom people commenting on my life

Symbolic Elements

thresholdmirrorspace

Ontological States

•
sovereign
•
transitional
•
coherent

Subsystems

•
cognitive
•
ethical
•
relational
•
infrastructural

Transmission Details

Source Type

local

Video Quality

1920 × 1080 @ 30fps

Duration

6:11

Bitrate

2660 kbps

Codec

avc1.640028