Hiking Peters Creek Trail Processing Life Transitions

May 12, 2024. rswfire is at a picnic table pavilion preparing to edit hiking footage. He's living in an RV, relying on mobile internet, and working through the early stages of his nomadic lifestyle transition. He's physically hiking Peters Creek Trail (1.3 miles) and processing recent life changes including leaving his previous living situation.

Energetic Signature

contemplative processing

Field State

early stabilization

Orientation

toward self-sufficiency and authentic expression

01HXQ1RERRABAN4JNKW6X839Y5

May 12, 2024

58:23

View on YouTube

Author

rswfire

Status

ARCHIVED

Type

TRANSMISSION (CAPTURE)

Temperature

0.00

[0:00]so I'm about to edit the video that I'm

[0:02]going to that you're about to

[0:04]see and I just want you to see where I

[0:10]am I finished hiking the trail and saw

[0:14]this spot and said oh I have to be

[0:16]there let me show

[0:20]you that picnic table is not very

[0:23]balanced so sitting on

[0:25]it do you remember doing this when you

[0:27]were

[0:28]younger hi I do did a lot of

[0:33]this just being at a park and sitting

[0:36]under a

[0:37]pavilion truly

[0:39]wonderful very very

[0:42]nice truly wonderful I should just pick

[0:45]a different picnic

[0:47]bench it's a very long one it probably

[0:49]will have to be an SD because that's

[0:51]just the way it works I rely on mobile

[0:54]internet one day maybe I will be able to

[0:58]share higher quality videos with you

[1:01]been thinking about

[1:03]patreon and be curious what you guys

[1:05]think about that thing is is I don't

[1:08]want to change who I am just because

[1:11]other people are helping me out

[1:13]so I've been very careful

[1:16]about my thoughts on that that's why I

[1:19]haven't really pursued anything like it

[1:21]yet I think I might have to and you'll

[1:23]see if you watch enough of this

[1:25]video um there's Clips at the end there

[1:28]will be and it's a very long hike and

[1:31]there are a lot of Silent moments I hope

[1:33]that you like them because that's what I

[1:36]want to share with

[1:38]you a lot of Silent moments with my

[1:42]dialogue interspersed throughout

[1:43]sometimes while I'm looking at the

[1:44]camera sometimes while I'm showing you

[1:47]what I'm looking at I saw some pretty

[1:49]cool things on the

[1:51]way so yeah we're on our way to Peters

[1:55]Creek uh it's like 1.3 M Trail but to

[1:59]get there you have to go a mile down

[2:01]this one it doesn't have a name it's

[2:03]paved which isn't my kind of

[2:05]thing but I think that's probably why

[2:07]it's called a bike trail so that's

[2:10]interesting I learned

[2:11]something but we just take this about a

[2:13]mile and then we'll get to Peters

[2:15]Creek about to enter our first loading

[2:21]screen got a nice tree canopy

[2:26]here definitely a bike tra

[2:31]let's see what's on these

[2:34]signs probably nothing I haven't seen

[2:40]already y just a bigger version of the

[2:44]map lots

[2:46]of oh coad snakes

[2:49]really oh guys remind me to tell you

[2:53]about the time I got chased by a

[2:55]rattlesnake we'll do that I guess we

[2:58]could do that now so when I was a boy

[3:00]scout in Arizona as a

[3:02]kid

[3:05]obviously um we were I think it was a

[3:07]Superstition Mountains and there was a

[3:09]rattles snake I was all by myself um

[3:12]that's kind of how I've always been you

[3:14]know the rest of the troop was away

[3:15]ahead and there was an assistant scoutm

[3:18]behind me like good long

[3:21]distance rattlesnake i t rattling really

[3:24]close to me I turned around and

[3:27]booked running down this Trail

[3:31]and I go around the curve and the

[3:33]assistance SC Master is right there I

[3:34]practically knocked him right off the

[3:36]mountain it was

[3:39]close yeah good times they're taking

[3:42]things slow today it's a much longer

[3:44]Trail and you know for my current

[3:47]physical Escape I want to show you these

[3:49]trees they're very tall very

[3:57]beautiful so as I always say my camera

[4:00]doesn't do it justice I will be getting

[4:03]a better camera because this is what I

[4:04]wanted to do if you look at my very

[4:06]first video I ever

[4:08]made this is what I wanted to do so I

[4:11]need a better camera one that better

[4:14]reflects human

[4:16]Vision um one thing I noticed

[4:19]was if I'm trying to show you hills and

[4:22]mountains it somehow mutes them it it

[4:25]makes

[4:26]them seem smaller and less Grand it's

[4:31]um things don't look like the right

[4:33]distance from what I'm looking with my

[4:35]eyes and just it's just not the

[4:39]same and if I'm going to share my

[4:41]journey with you I want to share it

[4:42]authentically and I don't think this

[4:43]camera does that I'll be honest and say

[4:46]I don't generally bring a backpack with

[4:48]me I know I probably should but um this

[4:51]has got all my stuff in it

[4:53]and I don't live in a house anymore it's

[4:56]a little bit of a different it's an

[4:57]adjustment like I had to carry this

[4:59]thing with me into

[5:01]Walmart it just is what it is there's

[5:05]some things you just want to keep on you

[5:06]at all

[5:07]times that didn't take long so that was

[5:10]definitely not a mile maybe it's not it

[5:12]wasn't clear how far it was maybe like a

[5:15]half mile maybe even less than that but

[5:17]here we

[5:18]are Peters Creek Trail do not know what

[5:22]we will find

[5:23]here think we will find

[5:29]hm what will we

[5:32]find so just in case you guys don't know

[5:35]this there are many snakes who like to

[5:37]pretend to be tree

[5:39]branches something to keep in mind so

[5:42]I'm not always

[5:44]introspective sometimes I just want to

[5:46]be in the

[5:47]moment and feels like one of those days

[5:50]sometimes I just want

[5:53]to push myself physically

[5:57]and that's really it like try not to

[6:00]think cuz I think all the time it's nice

[6:03]not to think

[6:04]sometimes admittedly that's hard for me

[6:07]but it's easier out

[6:10]here maybe there's some philosophy in

[6:12]that too I guess here's another little

[6:15]bit of um inside and before

[6:18]you um never be the first person on a

[6:21]trail or you will be walking into every

[6:24]spider weapon imaginable on your on your

[6:27]way

[6:28]through oh I used to hate that at Raven

[6:30]Run if you were the first one out there

[6:32]in the

[6:33]morning always hated that little spider

[6:35]webs getting all over your face

[6:38]and completely unavoidable

[7:00]I can't help it I'm always looking

[7:03]up I mean not always but I look up a lot

[7:06]I look up a lot I love to see tree lines

[7:08]I love tree

[7:10]canopies they're

[7:12]wonderful by the way it's very beautiful

[7:15]it's like 70° out

[7:17]today nice little

[7:20]breeze pretty idealistic

[7:24]honestly this is where the trail does a

[7:26]circle so we go to the left and go

[7:28]around and I'll come back and then we'll

[7:29]be back

[7:31]here and I guess that's how you make it

[7:33]1.3 miles or whatever it

[7:36]is it's fairly level Trail not a whole

[7:39]lot of elevation gain or

[7:42]loss it's very pretty I'll show

[7:54]you this in my

[7:56]backpack guess I could put it on

[7:58]properly

[8:00]I really don't bring backpacks with me

[8:02]unless I'm you know I'm really out there

[8:04]I mean even then like can go on full day

[8:08]hikes without a backpack all I need is a

[8:10]Mountain

[8:11]Dew that's all I ever

[8:14]needed I know how that sounds but it's

[8:16]true got one right here I think I think

[8:20]it's because I like to shed everything

[8:22]when I come into the woods that is what

[8:25]it's like for me to come into nature

[8:28]shed everything and just

[8:31]be in that moment in that

[8:34]space there's truly nothing that's more

[8:37]centering to

[8:38]me I just absolutely love it all right

[8:42]what did I tell you about me in

[8:45]maps well maybe this isn't part of the

[8:48]trail maybe it end somewhere let's go

[8:49]find out let's go get lost I think this

[8:52]is an unmarked Trail here at least on

[8:55]the main

[8:56]map see where it goes I think it might

[8:59]go to go to water this feels like a

[9:01]trail I could hike um every day while

[9:03]I'm

[9:04]here and I get it I should go out and

[9:06]explore

[9:08]more and I

[9:10]will but I do need to get in shape I

[9:13]need to get my stamina back and my my

[9:15]body into a better physical

[9:18]condition yeah this feels like a good

[9:20]trail it's very nice and peaceful

[9:24]and very beginner

[9:27]levish right look at this tream

[9:36]I'd say I would take a lot to follow

[9:38]that thing there's another one up

[9:41]here

[9:43]wow I mean it could be tree disease you

[9:47]know some kind of bug

[9:49]or those are Big Trees lots of roots

[9:53]there's another one right here

[10:03]it's your normal Forest debris you

[10:06]know nothing that would make you think

[10:08]there was like some catastrophic storm

[10:14]here it's a very tall

[10:17]tree kind of thin

[11:04]we have something coming up

[11:08]here whole lot of water we're about to

[11:11]see a lake

[11:37]this feels like a good place to build a

[11:38]house just like in

[11:41]Skyrim oh nice canopy

[12:03]truly don't think we're on the trail we

[12:05]were supposed to be

[12:13]on wonder have we

[12:16]found there water

[12:22]everywhere yep we're going downhill but

[12:25]we're going to have to climb this

[12:27]thing on the way back

[12:31]that will be

[12:33]fun my sins do

[12:45]hurt oh yeah we have a climb on our way

[12:49]out oh that's going to be

[12:51]fun but it's going to be worth it it's

[12:56]always worth it

[13:06]oh my

[13:08]God the oldest abandoned

[13:15]bus

[13:16]what how did it get out

[13:23][Music]

[13:24]here oh my God that's awesome

[13:36]how did it get out

[13:41]here I truly cannot

[13:55]imagine hope you have your TNA shots

[14:05]Meep beep road

[14:08]trip definitely has a 70s vibe to

[14:13]it or 60s I don't know probably more 60s

[14:18]right very cool that was worth it look

[14:23]at all those spider webs and all the

[14:24]windows I can't tell with my camera it's

[14:27]so sad

[14:29]all over

[14:31]them beautiful

[14:34]designs very talented

[14:50]spiders this is a place to

[14:54]meditate

[14:56]relax how did that bus go

[15:22]here oh I love this

[15:45]got a boat over there

[16:03]I have to

[16:04]admit I've been thinking a lot about how

[16:08]this is something I used to do by

[16:11]myself I wouldn't be carrying a camera

[16:13]on with me I'd just be enjoying

[16:16]it and it changes the experience a

[16:18]little bit you

[16:26]know those currents are just so

[16:30]cool you could just float your way all

[16:32]the way over

[16:46]here I'm just going to sit for a while

[16:48]and enjoy this I truly think I'd be

[16:51]happy on a deserted

[16:54]Islands before I bought my land or

[16:56]wanted the land I tried to buy for all

[16:59]just kept what I really wanted to buy

[17:01]was a little island somewhere I still

[17:03]want to do that so

[17:05]much just want to live on a little

[17:08]Island by

[17:11]myself I would just sit out here like

[17:13]this all

[17:15]day I would learn to fish feed myself

[17:18]become

[17:21]self-sufficient I'd be happy

[17:41]maybe that's what I'm working

[17:43]towards I have to get good at being

[17:46]self-sufficient and this Harvey will

[17:47]teach me

[17:52]that I truly that is my true

[17:56]dream had not shared that with you yet

[18:04]you just know when you're so where you

[18:08]belong that's where I

[18:18]belong this will be a very long steep

[18:21]walk up this

[18:23]hill that bus

[18:26]though so fascinating

[18:30]just imagine who was in

[18:33]there campers I guess who you

[18:37]know I mean that could have been like

[18:40]kids going to Camp or H it could have

[18:43]just be

[18:46]teenagers doing that

[18:48]whole free spirit thing from the 60s you

[18:51]know Vietnam and all

[18:53]that I don't

[18:55]know it does

[18:59]Sparks your

[19:01]imagination you could just sit

[19:04]here paint the

[19:06]bus I mean on canvas you know paint what

[19:10]you

[19:12]see

[19:18]contemplate different

[19:23]possibilities right short stories

[19:30]looks like some bees made their home up

[19:32]there once upon a

[19:39]time this is a beautiful resting spot

[19:41]for that

[19:49]bus hward

[20:03]right is

[20:08]curious over here

[20:20]too I'm guessing just something

[20:23]abandoned it's not like it's true

[20:25]infrastructure

[20:53]slow and

[20:56]steady deep breaths

[21:41]came up on another

[21:44]hiker he was not

[21:47]blant I don't like really interacting

[21:50]with people either but at least say

[21:54]hello you know

[22:01]oh it's so

[22:08]beautiful yeah I'm a little bit out of

[22:12]breath not like

[22:15]yesterday a moment there I

[22:17]thought maybe just guard what I said

[22:20]yesterday and we'll rest for a moment

[22:23]and I said no

[22:25]way we're not doing that

[22:33]let's go find another part of this Trail

[22:59]he was very attached to his phone just

[23:01]looking down at it

[23:03]and that's what's wrong with the society

[23:05]we live in

[23:06]now that includes me I'm holding a

[23:09]camera in my hand a

[23:12]phone

[23:15]and I've seen what it's done to

[23:18]us in all of its glorious

[23:22]details and it's going to be our

[23:25]downfall it will end us

[23:32]sorry to tell you that but it's

[23:42]true I mean there

[23:45]is a balance that needs to be

[23:48]found but you don't find

[23:52]balance not not the way our societies

[23:55]work and

[23:56]function we go from one extreme to the

[23:58]the

[23:59]next it's obvious where we're heading

[24:01]you see it don't

[24:06]you there's a reason I had to get that

[24:12]RV our society in collapse we

[24:18]are it only takes one thing one big

[24:21]thing and there are a bunch of big

[24:22]things that are just ready to start

[24:24]falling and all the others will as well

[24:33]it's going to

[24:35]happen I think we're Way Beyond the

[24:37]point of being able to save

[24:40]ourselves so here is where we were

[24:42]supposed to

[24:43]go always take the dete tours guys

[24:46]always

[25:06]you hear the wind

[25:38]I'm afraid of people not because I'm a

[25:40]scared

[25:41]person I'm afraid of people because I

[25:43]see what people really are

[25:45]like we should be afraid of

[25:49]them it's as simple as that

[26:08]I want that fear stop

[26:10]me I feel confident that you can handle

[26:14]any challenge that comes to my

[26:17]way doesn't mean you have to put

[26:19]yourself in unnecessary

[26:22]Peril and people are perilous they are

[26:53]yeah phone cameras don't show you depth

[26:55]very

[26:56]well they really don't

[27:07]Chad GPT says that's because we use two

[27:09]eyes to see but even if I close one of

[27:11]my eyes I still see the

[27:13]D so I don't understand

[27:17]that it does say there are cameras that

[27:19]do a much better

[27:21]job you know digital cameras with larger

[27:26]sensors in them

[27:29]I just thought these phones which are so

[27:32]expensive truely had it all but makes

[27:35]sense you can't cram everything into it

[28:22]I genuinely don't think I want to put

[28:23]music in my videos I think that

[28:26]it I Chang is what I'm trying to show

[28:29]you music is very

[28:32]powerful manipulate the hell out of

[28:35]you and I'm not trying to manipulate

[28:38]you I want you to enjoy

[28:41]this just as it was

[28:46]created not sure there's any music that

[28:48]truly Compares I think you have to be

[28:53]here it's trly appreciate it

[28:58]I thank you for joining me on this

[29:04]journey so I haven't

[29:07]fully

[29:10]um discovered and it is a discovery for

[29:14]me why I am doing this YouTube channel

[29:17]have not figured it

[29:18]out is not natural to

[29:22]me it is not

[29:30]I don't

[29:32]know feel like it's an act of seeking

[29:37]connection but I'm not finding

[29:39]connection here

[29:40]so got to keep doing it and I'm just

[29:43]trying to understand my motivations I

[29:45]haven't figured them out

[29:50]yet

[29:53]so can't promise I'll do this forever I

[29:55]truly don't know

[29:58]there has to

[30:01]be something that makes us feel valuable

[30:04]to me not feeling that

[30:07]yet I have heard from a few

[30:11]people who I feel like maybe I did help

[30:14]them in some way and that is

[30:17]wonderful and that in itself is probably

[30:20]a reason to do

[30:24]it but it does take a lot of emotional

[30:27]energy and

[30:28]effort

[30:30]and

[30:31]time none of

[30:34]which you know YouTube even

[30:37]acknowledges because of their tears

[30:39]which I qualify for none of

[30:41]them I can tell you this much as a

[30:44]programmer who

[30:46]has created many

[30:49]projects I understand what they're doing

[30:52]most of the money that they get from

[30:55]YouTubers like me are going to the big

[30:58]ones the big ones aren't making all

[31:00]their money for

[31:02]them that's just who they give the money

[31:06]to

[31:08]so does not feel like a fair

[31:12]platform and I know this is true I know

[31:15]it is because I have created many

[31:18]projects to had Revenue sharing them

[31:22]many I am truly a gifted programmer more

[31:26]than and I don't care that it sounds

[31:29]arrogant but more than 99% of the

[31:31]programmers out there and I have learned

[31:32]that from

[31:34]experience

[31:37]um they don't see the world the way I do

[31:40]so they don't see code the way I

[31:42]do

[31:44]it's I see behind the

[31:48]code I I can see the patterns

[31:51]and it's very difficult to

[31:55]describe whereas a lot of other

[31:57]programmers is it's just logic to them

[31:59]and they

[32:00]don't they don't see beyond the

[32:04]logic and they don't even they're not

[32:06]even all that logical cuz I am pretty

[32:08]logical myself very rational logical

[32:11]person I don't

[32:14]understand I'm not going to lie I should

[32:16]be a millionaire I should be I

[32:19]undervalued myself for

[32:21]decades did not know

[32:24]that cuz I am such an honest pure soul

[32:27]and that is a fact

[32:31]and now I'm just burnt out from it I

[32:33]don't want to do it

[32:35]anymore I truly

[32:37]don't for many years I man it to other

[32:41]programmers and and I mean many I have

[32:44]gone through hundreds of

[32:46]them and they are all

[32:49]crap I think I'm out maybe two gifted

[32:52]programmers in all of that time probably

[32:54]a

[32:56]decade yeah

[32:58]mind yeah I'm

[33:00]rare I know I'm

[33:03]rare I'm tired of being

[33:07]undervalued it's part of this as

[33:12]well I deserve to be out here doing what

[33:16]I'm doing right now but I don't know how

[33:18]I will continue to fund

[33:21]it

[33:26]sadly for

[34:23]it does not show you the depth you

[34:25]deserve to

[34:26]see for

[35:23]even if I could show you that d

[35:29]I wouldn't be able to upload

[35:32]it how sad is

[35:35]that do have a new satellite and um

[35:38]cable coming just it's not great

[35:41]starlink is not

[35:43]great in fact I don't think I've ever

[35:46]been able to upload a 4K video using

[35:48]starlink because it'll upload to like

[35:51]95% and then reset itself and start over

[35:54]over and over and over again

[36:01]so think in this Modern Age there'd be a

[36:04]solution but I have not found it

[36:06]yet best I've been able to do is my AT&T

[36:09]cell connection it's better than traveli

[36:12]most of the time and Starling for

[36:15]sure there are no good

[36:18]options that really surprised

[36:21]me I mean I remember when I was like 18

[36:24]years

[36:26]old I mean even back then I

[36:29]had you know I had laptops and

[36:36]um trying to think what we called them

[36:38]back

[36:40]then I mean basically hot spots and it

[36:44]could work out in the woods I'd done it

[36:47]many

[36:49]times that was

[36:51]probably one of the first real digital

[36:53]Nomads

[36:54]honestly hell I used to do that

[36:56]homeless

[37:05]yeah don't feel like it's been a very

[37:07]kind world to me to be honest with you

[37:09]I'm sorry if I'm seeing seem a little

[37:12]pessimistic that is definitely an energy

[37:14]I'm feeling right

[37:15]now let's try to improve

[37:19]that the truth is it could never have

[37:21]been any other way not with a person

[37:23]like

[37:25]me so I can't can't

[37:28]really be angry about

[37:31]it it's hard to explain

[37:35]that

[37:39]but could not have been a different I

[37:42]could not have gone

[37:44]differently I truly feel different from

[37:47]everybody

[37:48]else I know there are people like me

[37:51]there are not

[37:53]many there just

[37:55]aren't my own mother doesn't understand

[37:58]me I learn that all the

[38:00]time and it's

[38:03]sad feel very alone

[38:33]the feel true loves I had in my

[38:43]life there weren't

[38:46]many but they were very special people

[38:49]they didn't see it in

[38:51]themselves I guess I didn't see it in

[38:53]myself

[38:55]either but I saw it in them

[38:58]Bo did I try

[39:00]to show them what I saw but it just

[39:03]scared

[39:05]them I remember my last true love if you

[39:10]can call him

[39:12]that actually sat down with me and told

[39:16]me how he felt and no one had ever done

[39:19]that he said he

[39:21]felt I can't remember his exact words

[39:24]but something on the

[39:26]effect of intimidation he didn't feel

[39:28]like he was worthy of me I think he

[39:31]might have used words like that boy was

[39:34]I

[39:35]shocked because he I thought he was such

[39:38]a beautiful person such a beautiful soul

[39:40]an

[39:45]artist it broke my heart it broke my

[39:48]heart for

[39:49]Him and for myself and after that I

[39:52]stopped

[39:53]dating I mean what's the

[39:55]point I cannot subtle I'm incapable of

[39:58]that I'm incapable of it someone

[40:02]recently said to me I gave up on love

[40:04]that is

[40:05]false love gave up on me a very long

[40:08]time

[40:09]ago I even sure love is

[40:13]real

[40:15]um I'm not trying to sound pessimistic

[40:18]I'm really

[40:19]not just sharing with

[40:23]you you know my head space

[40:27]I would love to be proven wrong

[40:30]right but I cannot

[40:33]settle and you cannot look for the

[40:35]things that that was a thing I learned

[40:38]you can't you can't look for

[40:41]love if you're looking for it you will

[40:43]never find

[40:45]it you cannot find a thing cuz it's

[40:49]already within

[40:50]you and you have to love yourself first

[40:53]I truly believe

[40:55]that otherwise you just end up in bad

[40:59]relationships and I don't want to do

[41:01]that to myself or to someone

[41:03]else I want to

[41:07]be

[41:08]complete by myself and then I'll have

[41:12]space for somebody

[41:19]else there is a Grace and death

[41:50]renewal sorry guys

[41:59]I mean nobody's going to get this far

[42:01]into my video but do want to acknowledge

[42:04]I say guys a lot and it is a gendered

[42:08]word and I think about that but what

[42:11]other words do we have you

[42:13]know we

[42:16]don't we don't have gender neutral words

[42:19]in our

[42:21]culture but I acknowledge everybody I

[42:24]hope that you know that

[42:41]mostly been vaping today proud of that

[42:44]happy about

[42:47]it you know it's not healthy but it's

[42:52]healthier do they step in the right

[42:54]direction

[42:57]um I saw a study once where they

[42:59]compared lungs of a smoker versus a

[43:01]vapor and it's a big

[43:04]difference I think our trail ends up

[43:15]here definitely we'll get a different

[43:17]camera that doesn't have a cover on it

[43:20]for

[43:21]one definitely one that can better

[43:24]simulate human

[43:25]Vision CU usually should see this the

[43:27]way I see it the way it really

[43:34]is otherwise what is the

[43:41]point suppose you can use your

[43:48]imagination I can't claim that I would

[43:50]watch a video like this I don't believe

[43:52]I

[43:55]would but

[43:57]I have not found someone like

[44:00]me sure wish I

[44:21]could this may make no sense to

[44:25]you because it is a very weird

[44:28]Association for me to be making right

[44:31]now I

[44:33]mean for some reason that makes me think

[44:37]of the book called The Silo it's turned

[44:40]into a TV

[44:45]series and that is how an infj brain

[44:52]works here we

[44:54]are end of the trail

[45:01]well where the TRS meet each other again

[45:03]you

[45:04]know basically the

[45:14]end doesn't feel long

[45:16]enough this is what I do when I go out

[45:18]into the woods I process my

[45:22]feelings

[45:25]and and absolutely

[45:28]helps even if it does seem a little

[45:32]negative that's how you get them out of

[45:34]your system it's much better than

[45:36]keeping them

[45:42]in so I guess I turned out to be a

[45:45]contemplative hike after

[45:47]all I always

[45:50]are it's funny though I remember how I

[45:52]started it very different mood right

[45:57]I don't always make me

[45:59]sad I acknowledge how I feel in the

[46:03]moment and there's just so much that I

[46:06]have to process

[46:08]and this is how I do

[46:11]it and I move on I go on with the rest

[46:13]of my

[46:14]day um today that's going to

[46:18]include pulling out my little booknook

[46:21]cuz that's really what I want to do

[46:22]today making some potatoes and maybe

[46:25]even that fish

[46:28]wonder if I could do them together I

[46:29]don't

[46:31]know um I can ask you GPT I see what it

[46:37]says probably cook the potatoes for a

[46:39]while and then put the fish in something

[46:41]like

[46:42]that you do have to cook a little bit

[46:44]differently with the convection

[46:47]oven but I think I'll

[46:50]manage I must learn the skill it's very

[46:53]important I learn the skill

[47:01]just

[47:14]breathe one thing I forgot to tell you

[47:17]guys um I need to put these tank sensors

[47:19]on my

[47:20]RV was another thing I was contemplating

[47:23]this

[47:24]morning just need to get it done

[47:28]the sensors um do not

[47:30]work so I have no way of really

[47:33]monitoring my tanks I have to do it you

[47:36]know with the sonar that everybody

[47:41]has this was

[47:44]nice I need to keep doing

[47:47]this Watch what it does to me over

[47:50]time I I already know I'm talking to you

[47:58]I made I made the right

[48:00]choice I did I

[48:03]have I have not acknowledge it to you

[48:05]guys I have had moments of

[48:09]Doubt where I really felt I made a

[48:15]mistake I don't know if there are any

[48:17]true mistakes in life

[48:21]honestly they're just

[48:25]experiences we have grow for them or we

[48:30]don't

[48:33]I you think this is a good choice

[48:37]though difficult one I really miss my

[48:40]cats and my

[48:46]mom it can be a 47y old man and say that

[48:50]and if you are my age or any age really

[48:53]just saying if you can't say that

[48:59]that's toxic masculinity as far as I'm

[49:02]concerned the

[49:19]Sun how about we end it there I'm on my

[49:22]way to

[49:23]Walmart uh I know exactly what I'm

[49:25]getting there that includes what I

[49:28]talked about earlier and like a pan and

[49:30]some stuff for like my um my conduction

[49:33]oven I Med dat and everything and U I'm

[49:37]going to look at the like outdoor

[49:39]cooking supplies you know the camping

[49:42]stuff I learning that I love this I

[49:45] love this I

[49:48]am um all my stuff that I packed up to

[49:51]move here I

[49:53]didn't I haven't taken any of it out in

[49:55]2 days like that just tell me I don't

[49:57]need any of it I probably need some of

[49:59]it right but I'll figure it out and oh

[50:03]there was something else I was going to

[50:04]tell you

[50:06]guys oh so like there is a campground I

[50:09]want to go to that's not too far from

[50:11]here when you know when I leave next but

[50:13]I couldn't find availability but then I

[50:15]thought you know what maybe I could just

[50:17]move sights within the camp I did that

[50:18]at the last place so I'm going to let

[50:21]that

[50:21]out um and I was just thinking you know

[50:24]I just love Kentucky this time of year

[50:26]like this is just this is the time and

[50:28]and Autumn actually I really love I I

[50:30]love every season here

[50:33]actually I guess I'm making excuses for

[50:35]sticking around and not going on a long

[50:37]adventure I will do that eventually but

[50:40]right now I just I want to be here I'm

[50:42]having a lot of fun now so here's some

[50:45]advice for you guys do not ever go to

[50:48]the Glasgow Kentucky Walmart oh my God

[50:51]that was a disaster like it is the

[50:54]parking is really difficult you are just

[50:57]dodging human bombs

[50:59]everywhere uh it took me like an hour to

[51:01]get through like just you know the check

[51:06]out and this one guy he had two items he

[51:09]he was in there with me for like an hour

[51:11]it was just awful there's this I swear

[51:14]to God they must have some kind of a

[51:16]cell blocker there because even out in

[51:17]the parking lot it did not work until

[51:19]you got out onto the road so I couldn't

[51:22]even get directions it's crazy all of

[51:24]that being said uh I think that I did

[51:27]pretty good in there I couldn't find any

[51:29]12x 12 pans that was kind of sad but I

[51:31]found some like I found a few things um

[51:35]some glass things and even a couple of

[51:39]like um I don't know I'll just have to

[51:41]show you and some containers that you

[51:44]know collaps that they're stackable well

[51:47]not stackable that's that was the

[51:49]problem I had those stackable

[51:51]ones

[51:53]um and I just you got to understand I

[51:57]know I say I lived on the internet that

[51:58]is true but I also lived in my head

[52:02]I didn't consider myself with this world

[52:05]a whole lot I truly did not so

[52:09]anyways you know where things go inside

[52:12]of each other like like that so what

[52:16]else got plenty of potatoes some lemons

[52:19]to go with my fish that I have just cuz

[52:21]you UPC said you should do

[52:23]that um I got a MK that's a true outdoor

[52:27]mat so even if it gets wet it will you

[52:30]know I'll be able to keep it and it

[52:32]should like be really good at cleaning

[52:33]off mud off my boots cuz that happens a

[52:36]lot I didn't get a whole lot cuz I was

[52:38]being you know Frugal as I could be

[52:42]money is getting tighter in fact on my

[52:45]way here American Express lowered my

[52:47]credit limit I could not believe it in

[52:51]half so that was not good

[52:53]news I have been kind of hoarding my

[52:56]savings because you know I I just

[52:59]haven't got myself established in this

[53:00]lifestyle yet I've never been late

[53:03]paying my bills or anything like that

[53:04]and I wouldn't be probably for and I'm

[53:07]not sure I haven't really worked that

[53:09]out but I don't know 3

[53:12]months

[53:15]and I'm not going to hurt my credit you

[53:17]know I think I'm being responsible I had

[53:20]to make this change and I'm not going to

[53:24]hurt my credit in the process cuz

[53:25]there's a lot of things I want to do in

[53:26]the future so I don't know that was

[53:29]disappointing cuz all that does is hurt

[53:31]my credit more you know

[53:34]so oh well I know that I'm fortunate

[53:37]compared to lots and lots of other

[53:39]people it's very important though to

[53:41]know that I wasn't always I worked

[53:43]extremely hard and burnt myself out in

[53:45]order to do what I'm doing

[53:47]now and that's the truth I I got to tell

[53:51]you about an alarming Trend I'm seeing

[53:52]lately Jeep drivers who don't wave back

[53:55]when did that happen like like half of

[53:58]them like who are these people they

[54:00]shouldn't be driving Jeeps I'll tell you

[54:02]that right now m- that is a rant then

[54:05]maybe I'll even have a bigger meltdown

[54:07]about one day because what you are a tee

[54:10]driver wave at other tee drivers you

[54:12]know maybe because I grew up in

[54:15]Michigan at least until fourth grade and

[54:17]then ninth through

[54:19]like I don't know 27 uh you know it's

[54:22]always around Lakes maybe that's why I

[54:24]just didn't have I don't know I love the

[54:26]nature there for some reason it seems

[54:28]like I am just loving Lakes these days I

[54:31]just it's so beautiful out here they're

[54:33]all over the place here too and I just

[54:34]I'm I'm just loving it has a fire sign

[54:37]I'm just starting to find a balance as I

[54:39]got older you know and I need more water

[54:41]in my life that's a

[54:43]possibility um you know like I said once

[54:45]I was into astrology for a long time I

[54:48]was a Mary's and I was born in the year

[54:51]of the snake and that as a fire the fire

[54:55]snake

[54:57]so I I love that I I was really into

[55:01]fire so that is where the other part of

[55:03]my name comes from so now I am telling

[55:05]you guys and I've had that name since I

[55:08]was

[55:09]18 um let's see here yeah I just think I

[55:13]maybe I need more water in my life I

[55:15]don't know maybe that's something that

[55:17]just comes with age like I am learning

[55:20]to be a more balanced person cuz let me

[55:22]tell you something I amra being a fire

[55:24]sign I

[55:26]like I said yesterday I pushed myself so

[55:30]hard I used to have friends who would

[55:32]say you are burning both ends of the

[55:33]candle and you're going to regret that

[55:35]one day like you're crazy no mm- guess

[55:38]they were right they should know that

[55:40]you know most of my friends were always

[55:42]older so they had more wisdom than me if

[55:45]you haven't been following me for that

[55:46]long you're probably don't know like

[55:49]this is my true self like this is me if

[55:52]you were you know maybe following me for

[55:54]like the last couple weeks to months and

[55:56]you're like wow this guy's had a major

[55:58]transformation no I went through

[56:00]withdrawal my mental health was just

[56:02]shot I would encourage you to go back

[56:04]and watch my older videos as I Was

[56:06]preparing for this this life

[56:09]transition I mean there are parts of

[56:12]what I was going through that were very

[56:13]hard and I knew that I needed to change

[56:16]you know I wasn't my happiest

[56:18]one I was still myself I've just

[56:21]returned to myself I saw this happened I

[56:23]might even say

[56:24]that I've returned to earlier version of

[56:27]myself actually because this is this is

[56:30]how I was supposed to live I just got

[56:32]back we have some groceries to deal with

[56:35]of course we have Mountain Dew K we

[56:41]dinners

[56:44]containers

[56:45]um I got St St minut we got some

[56:48]potatoes a few little tiny pans a glass

[56:52]one those will you know hope they'll fit

[56:53]in my convection oven

[56:56]containers to put stuff in still have a

[56:59]fish so I got lemon and tartar sauce and

[57:01]I just like those kind of

[57:02]Olives some waterproof

[57:05]matches those little lighters there this

[57:08]was just too cool to pass out even

[57:10]though I do have some spices over

[57:12]here my mom helped me put these

[57:16]together um I want to learn to

[57:19]cook and then in the

[57:24]freezer so that looks like now I am that

[57:26]basic guys I am that's how I survived

[57:29]all these years all the way to 47 so

[57:32]don't knock

[57:33]it my fridge

[57:35]is a little bit different got some eggs

[57:39]in there orange juice crayon Apple

[57:42]Juice I got lots of fruits um to make

[57:45]smoothies but I haven't done that yet

[57:48]there's some fish in there tilapia I

[57:49]need to make soon before it

[57:51]expires um the yogurt I think that was

[57:54]supposed to go into the Smoothie

[57:55]something chat TBT

[57:57]suggested and then the cow and the

[57:59]spinach same

[58:00]thing you know then condiments

[58:04]and basically it um hot

[58:07]dogs um lunch meat basically simple

[58:12]stuff

[58:14]yeah so if you don't know that's one of

[58:16]my favorite games played it with my mom

[58:18]at my house and we cried like babies at

[58:20]the end it is that good you guys should

[58:22]play that

Summary

rswfire records a hiking video at Peters Creek Trail while editing from a picnic table pavilion. He discusses technical limitations with his mobile internet and camera quality, contemplating Patreon but concerned about maintaining authenticity. During the 1.3-mile trail hike, he discovers an abandoned bus in the woods and reflects extensively on his programming career, feeling undervalued despite his exceptional skills. He processes feelings of isolation, failed relationships, and his decision to live in an RV. The transmission includes practical concerns about RV tank sensors, grocery shopping at Glasgow Kentucky Walmart, and his simple cooking setup. He reflects on his YouTube channel's purpose, questioning his motivations while acknowledging some positive feedback. The video captures both the physical journey through nature and his internal processing of major life changes.

Signal Analysis

Substrate

This transmission demonstrates the field's capacity for real-time emotional processing while maintaining structural coherence. The hiking narrative serves as a container for deep pattern recognition about isolation, value, and systemic collapse, with the natural environment functioning as both mirror and stabilizing force.

Dominant Language

undervaluedauthentic/authenticallyrare/giftedconnectionself-sufficientburned outshed everything

Symbolic Elements

waterthresholdabandoned_infrastructurecanopydepthislandfire

Ontological States

•
transitional
•
sovereign
•
processing
•
coherent

Subsystems

•
emotional
•
cognitive
•
somatic
•
infrastructural

Transmission Details

Source Type

local

Video Quality

1920 × 1080 @ 30fps

Duration

58:23

Bitrate

4212 kbps

Codec

avc1.640028