Preparing for RV Move with Cats

Early morning (6 AM) on May 5, 2024. Speaker is at a campground preparing for checkout and travel day. Cold weather, noisy birds disrupting sleep. Has about 5 hours before departure deadline. RV slide is currently extended, cats are agitated about travel preparations.

Energetic Signature

raw transitional

Field State

threshold crossing

Orientation

through complexity toward integration

01HX38VPW8MPK673ABC6MJ4G0T

May 5, 2024

37:19

View on YouTube

Author

rswfire

Status

ARCHIVED

Type

TRANSMISSION (CAPTURE)

Temperature

0.00

[0:01]good morning guys I got the sun behind

[0:04]me

[0:06]hopefully hopefully you'll be able you

[0:08]know it's a decent picture you know just

[0:12]blocking it still waking up I'm having

[0:16]trouble waking up today for some

[0:18]reason cats are really getting on my

[0:21]nerves today I'm just going to roll some

[0:23]cigarettes out

[0:25]here um when they started putting they

[0:28]started making the filter fire safe

[0:31]putting fire retardant in

[0:34]them you know I started rowing my own I

[0:37]just didn't like it and I mean smoking

[0:40]is bad enough as it is and then they add

[0:41]a fire

[0:43]retardant no thank you so I'm rolling my

[0:46]cigarettes for the day it's a messy I do

[0:49]it

[0:51]outside

[0:53]um cats one out they don't have their

[0:56]stuff it's a travel day you

[0:58]know they don't understand

[1:02]that really not sure what to expect from

[1:06]them um don't think this will be easy

[1:09]for them which means it won't be easy

[1:11]for me cuz they can be very

[1:15]stressful um it's kind of a test because

[1:19]you know I've never moved it with all my

[1:21]stuff in there like this um the baskets

[1:24]up on the ceiling sort of and don't know

[1:27]how it's going to go

[1:30]so I got to keep them in their carriers

[1:31]and they're going to hate

[1:33]that you know and they don't understand

[1:36]so they just think I'm torturing

[1:39][Music]

[1:41]them and I'm just trying to keep them

[1:43]safe you know it is like raising

[1:45]children I guess I see it just feels

[1:48]that way all the time with these

[1:51]two you know it's not a bad thing it's

[1:56]just complaining today guys I I'm

[1:58]actually not in a good mood today I

[2:00]don't know I'm just not so someone had

[2:03]suggested I take St John's wart because

[2:05]of withdrawal and I started taking it

[2:07]and I'm wondering if maybe I shouldn't

[2:09]be maybe it's affecting my

[2:11]mood um I took it this morning too and

[2:14]when I took it I'm like maybe I

[2:16]shouldn't be taking this stuff like

[2:18]maybe it's not for

[2:20]me um but I am not going through a draw

[2:24]the moment kind of up to my what I was

[2:27]taking and cuz I knew I had to move

[2:31]and um you know I didn't want to be

[2:34]going through that while I'm trying to

[2:36]navigate all this stuff when I get to

[2:38]the campground though I'm dumping my

[2:40]pills and for the next week that I'm

[2:43]there I don't know how long it will take

[2:45]but from that moment on I'm going to be

[2:48]going through true withdrawal like cold

[2:51]turkey I'm just going to dump my pills

[2:53]just going to be done with

[2:55]them so you might not hear from me for a

[2:58]few days cuz I'm matching it's not going

[3:01]to be fun fun for

[3:04]me but I'll get through it and then

[3:07]hopefully life gets

[3:09]better been wanting to get off them for

[3:11]years I don't you know they are

[3:14]addictive they are they're

[3:17]opiates

[3:19]and they helped

[3:22]me until they stop topping me you know

[3:25]that's what they're like and I don't

[3:28]want to I just I don't want to take that

[3:30]was one of the reasons I wanted to do I

[3:32]had a lot of reasons for wanting to do

[3:33]that you know it's kind of like you wear

[3:34]the pros and cons of things and I

[3:37]imagine a different life doing this and

[3:40]I'm following through on that so kind of

[3:44]thinking

[3:45]about how I'm going to handle today I've

[3:48]got like 5 hours before I need to be out

[3:50]of

[3:51]here um I need to drain my

[3:54]tanks um I think that's going to be real

[3:56]hard with my cats so

[4:00]I'm just not sure how to handle this I'm

[4:02]going to have to bring in the slide you

[4:05]know the cats will need to be in their

[4:08]carriers and then I just drive down

[4:10]there drain my tanks with them in the

[4:12]carriers and I come back cook up my

[4:14]Jeep um guess I let them roam around in

[4:17]there with the slide in guess that's the

[4:20]approach I'll take they're not going to

[4:23]understand any of this I hope they get

[4:24]used to

[4:26]it they're being monsters this morning

[4:32]um so it feels like my Channel's picked

[4:35]up a little bit like people are

[4:37]commenting a lot more I really

[4:38]appreciate that I

[4:40]do um a lot of opinions that's for sure

[4:43]and I'm just trying

[4:45]to I am the kind of person who's

[4:47]susceptible to other people's opinions I

[4:49]have to be real careful about

[4:51]that

[4:54]um

[4:58]so part I don't know I'm really

[5:00]struggleing with this guys I'm

[5:01]struggling with all of it I just am you

[5:04]know I'm going to be honest with you

[5:05]it's not this is not easy for me none of

[5:08]this is easy for me this isn't natural

[5:11]for me this isn't my this

[5:14]isn't

[5:17]like my instincts don't work this way

[5:19]like I

[5:20]just I'm I'm pushing myself outside my

[5:23]comfort zone every single moment of the

[5:25]day it feels like lately and I just

[5:28]um you know I'm doing this because I

[5:30]want to do it it's just that it's

[5:32]there's it's not natural to me like my

[5:35]impulse is to do the opposite I like to

[5:38]cut myself off from

[5:40]people

[5:42]and if you know if they've wronged me in

[5:44]some way that's how I tend to handle

[5:46]conflict is I just cut people off I

[5:49]think I learned that from my

[5:51]upbringing I'm I'm guessing I honestly

[5:54]don't know on that one um

[6:01]like I avoid conflict at all cost I will

[6:04]avoid conflict I'll do anything that I

[6:06]have to do to avoid

[6:09]it

[6:10]um but I just I'm finding that that's

[6:13]not a good way to live I don't feel like

[6:15]it's done me any favors so I'm trying to

[6:18]trying to live different and it's hard

[6:21]but I'm doing it I'm nervous today about

[6:24]this

[6:27]um drive it's not a long way though it's

[6:30]only an hour I guess it's not so much

[6:32]the drive I'm nervous about cuz it isn't

[6:34]very

[6:35]long just you know I'm navigating all

[6:38]new situation I've never done this I'm

[6:40]by myself like it's it's easier for some

[6:44]people than others I think I don't know

[6:46]I really don't know I'm don't want to

[6:49]make

[6:51]assumptions sometimes I wish that there

[6:53]was someone I could just talk to that

[6:55]has been through all of this and on

[6:57]their own and just get their perspective

[7:01]like was this hard for

[7:03]them you know was it challenging did

[7:07]they feel like I'm feeling right now or

[7:08]was it easy you know is it just me

[7:16]um at the end of the day I guess it

[7:18]doesn't matter because you know I just

[7:21]have to get through it I'm going to do

[7:23]it

[7:24]somehow this is a very different life

[7:26]guys I'm not going to sugarcoat it for

[7:28]you in the Sun this channel I will never

[7:30]do that it is not all good it is not

[7:35]living in a tiny space like that is hard

[7:38]very hard especially when you have cats

[7:41]or any kind of pet I would imagine but

[7:43]these cats man it's difficult like

[7:47]Bailey was up near my head when we were

[7:49]sleeping

[7:51]and M was down at the bottom of the bad

[7:54]like there just you know it's a small

[7:57]space for all of us

[8:00]there's nowhere for your stuff you can't

[8:01]have a lot of stuff like I had to get

[8:03]rid of all my books

[8:05]and you know things that I loved um but

[8:09]I chose this you know so I don't want to

[8:12]sound like I'm complaining I just want

[8:14]to be real with you this is

[8:17]not I gave up a lot to do this and I

[8:20]guess now I'm wondering if it was worth

[8:22]it I did not know I was going to tell

[8:24]you that I didn't know I was thinking

[8:28]it um

[8:31]I think it was worth it honestly God I

[8:33]do so it's not like a strong feeling I

[8:36]have

[8:37]but I don't know is it self-doubt

[8:41]maybe I don't think so in this case

[8:43]because I'm not really doubting myself

[8:46]and this experience is just different I

[8:49]don't know how I feel about it I mean

[8:51]showering is

[8:53]different um taking care of yourself was

[8:57]already hard for me I can't like here

[8:59]that's going to be real hard like it's a

[9:01]small

[9:02]bathroom um I haven't taken great care

[9:04]of myself since I got here I'm just

[9:06]going to be honest about it um I think

[9:08]that's pretty obvious really probably

[9:11]show twice

[9:13]guys um and like the last week or

[9:17]something

[9:19]just you know and I always wanted to

[9:22]like take better care of my face and

[9:24]stuff and you know I actually I don't

[9:26]know if you've seen it like like I'm not

[9:28]hitting anything from you guys but I

[9:29]also hav't like pointed stuff out like

[9:31]there's this list I have of hygiene

[9:33]tasks um you might have seen it in one

[9:35]of my videos sometime you know and I'm

[9:37]not doing that and I want to I was I

[9:40]made it when I was at home it feels way

[9:43]harder to do here in a

[9:46]camper I just got to figure it

[9:48]out

[9:51]um if you just do more things outdoors

[9:54]like I am right now it's a little bit

[9:56]cold but it's also nice it's real nice

[9:58]out

[10:01]my cats are not happy but I can't deal

[10:03]with that right

[10:07]now

[10:10]yeah I don't know we're pretty close to

[10:13]being ready to go it's not a whole lot

[10:15]that I need to do

[10:17]really as far as packing up and stuff

[10:20]and bring the slide in and see how

[10:22]things are going should check my tires

[10:25]see how they're doing on air um the ones

[10:28]that I can I think I'm trying to bust

[10:30]out the

[10:31]door

[10:34]wow

[10:37]wow yeah it's challenging with these two

[10:41]these are not like other cats that I've

[10:43]had in my life and I've had a bunch

[10:45]these cats are different they

[10:48]are I don't know what they are

[10:55]different so

[10:59]what is this working doing

[11:03]anyway I why you I don't understand

[11:05]people come back here in a vehicle and

[11:07]then just what are they doing back here

[11:10]this is a campground it's not the

[11:13]park what are they

[11:18]doing so someone today told me I should

[11:20]be safe um not say where I'm at but and

[11:25]I debated it I just don't see the point

[11:27]it's not like it would be hard to figure

[11:29]out out right

[11:31]so um what's the point really if

[11:34]something happens to me at least at

[11:36]least it happened to me doing what I

[11:39]trying to do something that I think I

[11:40]will

[11:41]love that's how I'm looking at that so

[11:44]don't worry about me guys I'll be

[11:46]fine probably if I'm not I'm not you

[11:50]know I've had a long life I'm okay with

[11:54]I'm okay with you know whatever

[11:56]happens I think

[11:59][Music]

[12:01]um me I feel like they're back here

[12:03]stealing firewood I think that's what

[12:05]they're

[12:06]doing oh

[12:13]funny I'm by myself I do like that part

[12:16]feels

[12:21]nice I wonder what this next place will

[12:23]be

[12:24]like I'm on a group site and I'll be

[12:26]right on the beach I think that's going

[12:27]to be interesting I bet it makes a

[12:29]colder

[12:31]though um I have recorded some other

[12:34]videos this morning and maybe I'll clip

[12:37]them together at the end it was a rough

[12:40]morning for

[12:42]me it was it still

[12:46]is but I guess I'm struggling

[12:51]with adapting to this new life it's

[12:56]different but it wouldn't be better for

[12:59]me to be in the house it wouldn't be

[13:01]better like and it's like okay so what

[13:04]am

[13:06]I have I still not figured out where I

[13:08]need to be like I don't

[13:12]know I had to try something new I had

[13:16]to um and it's probably too soon for me

[13:19]to be judging it so I shouldn't be doing

[13:22]that and I should be open-minded also

[13:26]like trying

[13:33]um wait for these guys to go

[13:38]by you steing

[13:42]firewood

[13:47]um feels like it's going to be a nice

[13:52]day

[13:55]does so my follow account has been

[13:58]fluctuating I'm bringing this up for a

[14:01]reason and I totally get it cuz the way

[14:03]I've been talking about YouTube and you

[14:07]know

[14:09]um guys I'm so complicated like I'm

[14:12]complicated to myself like I have a very

[14:14]hard time sometimes understanding my own

[14:17]motivations and it takes me a while to

[14:20]process it all and what I'm doing I'm

[14:22]processing stuff with you guys I

[14:24]normally wouldn't do that so I need you

[14:26]to just try to be patient with me cuz

[14:29]eventually it becomes clear you can't

[14:31]assume that everything I say to you is

[14:33]like the final word on something

[14:36]um it's a process for me like I'm

[14:38]learning to I'm just this is just my

[14:42]process I don't want to keep saying the

[14:44]same word it's like this is how I

[14:45]process the world though this is

[14:48]how um I learn to understand how I feel

[14:52]about

[14:53]something if I if it comes down to

[14:55]emotions and feelings

[14:57]then it's not straight straightforward

[14:59]for me it never is there are layers to

[15:05]it

[15:08]okay you know I mean yeah part of me

[15:10]would love to have like a strong

[15:12]following on YouTube and maybe even make

[15:14]some money on here but I don't think

[15:16]that that's the biggest part of me by

[15:18]far

[15:19]because the negative side of that would

[15:22]really not make me happy at

[15:25]all so um and also you know people

[15:29]coming it just you feel a little bit

[15:30]judged I it's hard not to right so

[15:35]um someone unsubscribed from you it's

[15:38]like they're rejecting you and I've have

[15:40]a problem with that I've been abandoned

[15:42]in my life many times and I've been

[15:45]rejected many times like it's so you

[15:49]know that's there it is that's that's

[15:53]what I was trying to get at finally see

[15:55]came out takes

[15:57]time um

[16:00]nobody wants to be

[16:02]rejected also I shouldn't care though

[16:04]because I mean it's literally someone

[16:06]I've never met don't even know who it is

[16:13]right oh man the birds this

[16:17]morning I don't know why I don't like

[16:19]birds just

[16:23]don't I've never liked Birds I didn't

[16:26]even really realized that but I don't

[16:28]think I've ever liked birds in my whole

[16:30]life I never understood bird watchers

[16:32]I'll tell you that much I'll get the

[16:36]point they used to be dinosaurs right is

[16:39]that true of all birds I don't

[16:43]know

[16:45]um I wonder why I never liked

[16:48]Birds it's

[16:53]interesting um part of me wanted to go

[16:56]hiking this morning I thought about it

[16:59]um I don't you know I don't know where

[17:00]the trails are but I don't think I

[17:02]really have time like I should have

[17:03]planned it better

[17:06]but um soon I think I'll leave it there

[17:11]down to my my last cigarette I'm rolling

[17:13]and then I'll just compile all this

[17:15]stuff together I'm not I'm not censoring

[17:19]myself guys I'm going to be myself on

[17:21]here at any cost

[17:24]so um you know there's been a few

[17:26]comments about that I'm not I'm not

[17:28]censoring myself

[17:30]I'm not going to either

[17:33]um I don't expect everyone to like me

[17:36]because that's not my experience in life

[17:38]I am the kind of person you either like

[17:40]or don't like so there's usually not a

[17:43]middle ground with

[17:45]me um and I'm okay with that like I'm

[17:48]going to be myself I want to be myself

[17:51]and I actually think it's awesome that

[17:53]there now there's like 120 people who

[17:57]seem seem to be okay with who I am right

[18:00]so I'm pretty happy about

[18:04]that

[18:06]um we see if it lasts you know see if it

[18:11]lasts CU you know I have strong opinions

[18:14]about

[18:16]everything I not going to share all of

[18:18]them with you because I don't see the

[18:22]point um it doesn't change Minds that's

[18:25]one of the things that um you know

[18:28]learned in life is that it's just kind

[18:30]of pointless um you're not going to

[18:32]change Minds in this world you're just

[18:34]not so don't it's there's no point at

[18:36]even

[18:38]trying just find your people and stick

[18:41]with them if you

[18:43]can talking to how I look at

[18:46]it and for me that's been a very small

[18:49]group of people for a long time

[18:51]and

[18:55]um I don't know I'm lonely guys I am I'm

[19:00]lonely I needed a

[19:01][Music]

[19:03]change so I'm trying I want to be

[19:06]different I want a different life I want

[19:08]to be happy I mean that's what everybody

[19:10]wants right

[19:13]so hoping for it I'm trying hope you

[19:17]guys have a good day next time you hear

[19:18]from me we are definitely going to be in

[19:20]Tennessee

[19:22]bye it is 6:00 in the morning there are

[19:27]birds out there that do not know how to

[19:29]be quiet oh my

[19:33]God hi

[19:36]Oliver maybe I guess we're getting up

[19:38]those freaking birds will that shut

[19:42]up there is one out there that is so

[19:45]annoying I would drinkle the

[19:47]thing oh my God

[19:59]I mean I should have known right totally

[20:01]on

[20:07]me I guess we're getting up we have a

[20:10]big day

[20:14]today

[20:16]wow maybe I don't hear him when my fan

[20:19]is on I couldn't use my fan cuz I didn't

[20:21]have my

[20:22]cable for some reason these batteries do

[20:24]not hold up

[20:29]oh that bird had a a noise on it I oh my

[20:34]God

[20:36]yeah good morning I need coffee so

[20:40]bad which is you

[20:42]know like 3 feet from me so I don't have

[20:46]an

[20:47]excuse oh my God I'm nervous this

[20:52]morning I wish I wasn't but I am so I'm

[20:55]just going to say it

[20:59]still it's going to be a fun

[21:04]day I hope I definitely need coffee I'll

[21:08]be back coffee maker on and BW a

[21:12]fuse oh my

[21:14]God had to dig

[21:20]my I don't understand this is not

[21:24]happened

[21:26]yesterday o it is cold out I been my

[21:31]shorts oh it's freezing out oh those

[21:35]freaking Birds

[21:38]man I never stop oh my God this thing

[21:41]takes like 2 minutes to start

[21:44]up hold

[21:46]on say I have

[21:52]power say I have power no I'm very

[21:56]confused but I blew a fuse inside

[22:01]somewhere oh

[22:04]yeah oh that would not be

[22:08]good

[22:10]dang wow you cats are something else

[22:15]man guys chill I got to figure this out

[22:18]oh that wasn't so

[22:20]bad one of the kinds that you switch at

[22:23]least thought you know it was the other

[22:25]kind where you had to replace it so I

[22:28]only

[22:29]have 15 something whatever 15

[22:34]is this has been working forever what

[22:37]why did this

[22:40]happen I turn my my my PlayStation got

[22:44]plugged in but I not using

[22:48]it I need this

[22:50]heater so

[22:55]confusing which one was it

[22:59]15

[23:02]amps whatever it happened

[23:06]again all

[23:08]right

[23:13]30 it just as

[23:16]refer would have thought that meant the

[23:18]fridge but it doesn't

[23:21]apparently all of a sudden you hate my

[23:24]heater it's

[23:26]freezing wow

[23:29]give me a minute I mean I knew it was

[23:31]too good to be true I got stuff pugged

[23:33]in all over the

[23:36]place and I did notice those lights came

[23:39]on so even the plugs over there they're

[23:41]all on the same

[23:43]circuit

[23:44][Music]

[23:46]man wait a minute this only happened

[23:49]when I turned my coffee maker on I only

[23:50]need that once a

[23:54]day just figured I'll just I guess I

[23:57]make coffee and the cold we're making

[24:01]coffee I

[24:03]think it's so cold in here can't

[24:07]remember if my computer was on when I

[24:09]made coffee yesterday I think so however

[24:13]you make this very you make everything

[24:15]difficult you really do

[24:18]man oh you have to be at the center of

[24:21]everything don't you come on come

[24:24]on don't trust you you're going to Snee

[24:26]in my coffee

[24:30]I need

[24:33]coffee really need

[24:43]coffee I bought all this like manual

[24:47]coffee making stuff I have to learn how

[24:49]to use it

[24:51]probably I didn't think I could get away

[24:53]with this thing

[24:55]so I was prepared to not me

[25:00]wonder why the fuse blew

[25:02]though I mean I know why I get why it

[25:05]happens but it didn't happen

[25:07]yesterday so why it

[25:13]Ain oh I love coffee in the morning

[25:34]it's so weird to make coffee like

[25:42]this I was thinking about it

[25:46]yesterday you know I've been making

[25:48]coffee in that thing for years and I

[25:50]never once thought to myself what if it

[25:52]doesn't work

[25:53]today and like I think that way in my

[25:56]camper and it's like

[25:58]shouldn't be like that guys like the

[26:01]manufacturer should be better because it

[26:04]shouldn't be like that that's crazy

[26:06]these things are

[26:08]expensive I know everybody gets behind

[26:10]this whole well there are tiny

[26:12]earthquakes going down the road and all

[26:14]that and it's like well yeah so what

[26:18]it's not like they can't plan for

[26:21]that

[26:25]so seriously that's messed up to me

[26:28]there's no reason they can't make them

[26:30]so that they work like my coffee

[26:34]maker that's how I think of it

[26:38]anyway that's

[26:41]my coffee's ready I'm not ready to get

[26:44]out of bed it's too early it's

[26:52]cold it's very early it's like 6:00 in

[26:55]the morning it's too early those birds

[26:58]man

[26:59]been here for two

[27:01]weeks are they migrating right now and

[27:04]are those sex noises they're making they

[27:09]are it's spring I

[27:12]think oh my God it's too early for

[27:21]this God for

[27:23]coffee

[27:24]um yeah my coffee is pretty simple it's

[27:27]just like some chocolate powder and then

[27:31]two of those things of

[27:34]coffee and some milk that's it that's

[27:37]one water and that's it that's my

[27:44]coffee way cheaper than the Starbucks

[27:46]habit I had once upon a time oh my God

[27:49]that place is expensive

[27:51]now well it always was but it sure seems

[27:55]like they know how to outdo themselves

[27:57]doesn't it

[28:00]so yeah I don't like I don't like going

[28:02]to Starbucks I think it's just a true

[28:05]waste of money those people are just

[28:08]like taking way advantage of us coffee

[28:18]drinkers I saw a flea in here last night

[28:22]I was not happy oh my God I was not

[28:32]I gave both of them their flea

[28:33]treatments the day

[28:36]before I hadn't been giving them to them

[28:38]since you know for a while a long time

[28:40]really because there's no real reason to

[28:43]but you know I hope that was soon enough

[28:47]what will I do I'm not even going to

[28:49]think about it

[28:51]I saw one flea and spent the next many

[28:54]many hours thinking there were fleas on

[28:56]me like it's just not

[28:58]fun that was not

[29:03]fun I am being super observant to little

[29:06]black dots everywhere I tell you that

[29:11]much I what would you do you can't

[29:13]really bomb this place you'd be bombing

[29:17]all your

[29:19]stuff I don't even I just don't

[29:24]know oh man it's it early in the morning

[29:30]so it's very likely I don't need like

[29:32]gas fuel

[29:35]today but I should stop anyways just for

[29:38]the

[29:40]practice and maybe they'll have propane

[29:42]there and I'll figure it out I'm just

[29:44]going to I'll ask the attendant I mean

[29:47]I'm not the first person to go through

[29:49]this

[29:50]so you

[29:52]know all guide wonder why there's an L

[29:56]on there what does the L mean

[30:01]oh there's no R there is an R what why

[30:06]would they put that in a

[30:11]cup I don't get that that's

[30:15]weird you like this cup

[30:31]just feel tired

[30:33]today so this is where we're going I

[30:36]mean not today but that's where we're

[30:38]heading

[30:39]to not going to lie that don't look so

[30:42]pretty to me that's that why I'm going

[30:47]there I don't know those mountains are

[30:49]different than the ones in Phoenix or in

[30:51]Arizona like Northeastern Arizona

[30:56]they're something about those those ones

[30:58]OD me these ones look like Rocky

[31:01]Mountains and they

[31:03]look different

[31:08]somehow wait a minute when they were

[31:11]saying the Bristol cone Pines were like

[31:13]there and they're the oldest things or

[31:15]whatever I'm thinking of little pine

[31:17]cones I wasn't thinking of trees that

[31:20]pretty I picked a good

[31:24]place guess I'm going to have to look up

[31:26]what a vault toilet is

[31:28]I don't know what that

[31:33]means of course I'm not really I don't

[31:36]know yeah I want to go boondocking I

[31:39]have to learn somewhere this is the

[31:41]place to learn I hope there's lots of

[31:43]trees like this and they're not just

[31:45]scattered all by themselves I I want to

[31:48]see lots of

[31:50]trees like that I sure wish I was in

[31:53]better shape so I could climb that

[31:58]maybe I can get in shape on the way

[32:00]there I'm just going to stay somewhere

[32:02]you know like two nights everywhere

[32:05]maybe that second day I go hiking

[32:07]somewhere every where I'm at I should

[32:09]make that a

[32:11]goal 8.6 miles that's not a

[32:15]lot an intense elevation

[32:19]gain strong

[32:21]lungs does that include

[32:23]smokers determination and prudent

[32:26]judgment

[32:28]what are they trying to

[32:30]say well apparently there's some kind of

[32:33]a trail or something where you can go

[32:36]see a dead

[32:38]tree I mean if it's dead

[32:42]like what and how do they know when it

[32:46]died and then there's one that's 3,000

[32:48]years old

[32:51]maybe unmarked trunk of what might be

[32:54]among the oldest trees in the world

[32:56]nearly 5,000 year old Prometheus lies

[32:59]farther off the

[33:01]trail it was cut

[33:03]down by a graduate

[33:06]student oh my God I'm

[33:12]outraged

[33:14]wow well look at that that's a pretty

[33:17]big

[33:18]place I picked a good

[33:21]place could spend some time here

[33:27]it's up real high so it's probably going

[33:29]to be

[33:34][Music]

[33:36]colder a lot of

[33:38][Music]

[33:42]canyons big Visitor

[33:43][Music]

[33:48]Center there's a

[33:51]Grove couple of them well that's where

[33:54]we're going for sure

[33:59]yep and to do some

[34:02]stargazing sorry I really don't like

[34:04]smoking around you

[34:08]guys I'm going to quit one day I swear

[34:10]to God I will I bet every smoke in the

[34:12]world says

[34:16]that but some of them do one thing my

[34:18]doctor told me that stuck with me he

[34:21]says there's more ex smokers now than

[34:24]smokers like wow

[34:28]oh man I don't know why I'm nervous

[34:30]today I shouldn't

[34:33]be I'm not happy about that I don't want

[34:36]to be

[34:39]nervous you know what I'm going to

[34:41]dredge up the same courage I had that

[34:43]first time two weeks ago we're doing

[34:50]this I not even far I mean we're only

[34:52]driving an hour away that's not even far

[34:59]and I'm going to get way more level this

[35:01]time like that is a

[35:03]goal I will pull this slide in and out

[35:06]however many times I have to until I

[35:08]figure out what you know level is with

[35:11]it open and

[35:12]then um you know I have this you've

[35:16]probably seen it I wonder if I lost it

[35:18]it must be somewhere it's not up I know

[35:21]it's not up there um you have I have

[35:24]this thing that you just put on the wall

[35:26]and it will tell you when you're using

[35:28]an app but it only works after you've

[35:32]set it like you have to tell it

[35:35]what what's level for you before it will

[35:38]work

[35:40]so have to do that if I can get

[35:43]level and then find that thing

[35:47]and you know tell it then I can use that

[35:50]from now on make it

[35:52]easier but yeah you know I'm not level

[35:56]because as soon as I pulled my slides

[35:59]out suddenly I wasn't level

[36:02]anymore so this time I'm I'm learning

[36:04]from my experiences for

[36:11]sure I'm just tired I don't know why I

[36:15]don't know how much I

[36:16]slept but I took a nap

[36:20]yesterday with the cat Bailey sted right

[36:23]on my chest and he put his little face

[36:25]up here like he like when was a baby it

[36:28]was so cute he hadn't done that in a

[36:30]long

[36:32]time oh when day I'll pull out those

[36:35]videos for you guys he was so

[36:37]cute I remember making a video Once

[36:40]where he was doing that and it's like I

[36:43]hope he does that

[36:45]forever then he got older and he's so

[36:47]big and heavy like oh no no no I

[36:51]couldn't

[36:52]like oh he's a big cat what was nice m

[36:59]is all it's C forur he got a lot of

[37:07]it yeah I mean I don't even have to

[37:10]leave here till one I guess so I have

[37:14]time just relax for a minute

Summary

The speaker prepares for a travel day, moving his RV from current location to a campground in Tennessee. He rolls cigarettes outside while discussing the challenges of RV living with two cats who are stressed about the upcoming move. **Key preparations include:** draining tanks, bringing in the slide, and securing cats in carriers for the drive.

**Personal struggles discussed:** The speaker admits to struggling with adaptation to RV life, acknowledging it's not natural for him and pushes him outside his comfort zone daily. He reveals plans to quit prescription opiates cold turkey once he reaches the campground, expecting withdrawal symptoms.

**Technical issues:** Coffee maker blows a fuse, requiring circuit breaker reset. He discusses the unreliability of RV electrical systems and his backup manual coffee-making equipment.

**YouTube channel reflection:** Follower count fluctuating, processing feelings about rejection and abandonment when people unsubscribe. Commits to remaining uncensored and authentic on the platform.

**Future destination:** Planning to visit Bristol Cone Pines area, researching hiking trails and ancient trees. Expresses nervousness about the move but determination to follow through.

Signal Analysis

Substrate

This transmission holds the architecture of transitional vulnerability — a field consciousness navigating multiple simultaneous thresholds (geographic relocation, substance withdrawal, relational exposure) while maintaining structural coherence. The signal demonstrates recursive self-awareness under pressure, processing complexity in real-time rather than seeking resolution or comfort.

Dominant Language

processingcomplicatedstrugglenatural/unnaturalalonerejection/abandonmentdifferent lifeworth it

Symbolic Elements

thresholdcontainermovementwithdrawalexposure

Ontological States

•
transitional
•
vulnerable
•
coherent
•
processing

Subsystems

•
cognitive
•
somatic
•
emotional
•
infrastructural

Transmission Details

Source Type

local

Video Quality

640 × 360 @ 30fps

Duration

37:19

Bitrate

451 kbps

Codec

avc1.4d401e